Chapter 28: Moonlight Butter Doesn't fly You Idiot.
Chapter 28: Moonlight Butter Doesn't fly You Idiot.
While the abundant greenery was a welcome change of scene for me the humidity wasn't. While the warmth wasn't an issue thanks to the drake cloak but the humidity made me aggressively uncomfortable. I wasn't used to it since the rest of lordran was as dry as could be. But it wasn't like I wasn't going to spend much time here anyway.
I had already made a mental checklist of the things I needed from here. I would take them and make my leave. I wasn't a fan of this location before and I sure as hell wasn't going to be one now.
Plus the area boss should be fairly easy according to the game at least anyway.
While game knowledge likes proving me wrong but cmon...
It's the moonlight butterfly.
Anyway, I started making my way through the forest. And surprisingly there weren't many insects as I could see. Although now that I think about it they are probably dead, thanks to the carnivorous vegetation. It seems like the most of insects left in lordran are cockroaches.
After walking a bit, I encountered the first enemy. But they hadn't encountered me yet. I could spot those odd-looking bushes from a mile away thanks to my... less than pleasant experience with them while playing the game.
I took out one of the many longswords I had in my inventory and threw it like a javelin at the bush. Spearing and stapling it to the ground instantly. After wriggling around for a bit, the bush stopped moving.
< You have slain 1x{Demonic Foliage} +200souls >
I went up to the unmoving plant corpse and retrieved my blade. But as I was doing so a thought entered my mind.
I always wondered what they would taste like...
Ripping a piece off the foliage I brought it up to my mouth and chomped down.
...
Yup, Just tastes like pain. I don't think there is anything conceivable that can be more bitter than this shit.
< You have acquired the trait {Elementary Poison Resistance lv.1}!>
That's nice. After washing down the horrible aftertaste with some estus I continued down the path. Along the way were some cool-looking glowing flowers which I really wanted to pocket but doubted they would still glow for long after getting picked.
And it seemed like the second am-bush(get it?) I encountered was smarter than his predecessor as it jumped up the moment it sensed me. I didn't panic one bit and still approached it at a steady and firm pace. The bush raised one of its tentacle arms at me.
*Grab*
I raised my forearm and intercepted the tentacle which the foliage used to wrap around my arm in an attempt to pull me toward himself I guess.
It just seemed like I forgot that I'm over 10 times heavier than it and have far higher strength.
Suddenly I jerked my bound arm back, sending the bush flying toward me. I then stabbed it in the area that resembled a head the most with a straight sword. Killing it.
There was one more bush in my way which I threw a lightning spear at, incinerating the poor bushling. After that, I arrived at a wide cliff-face-like part of the garden next to some ruins and a path next to the ruins.
And it seemed like the bushling next to my foot was either really shy or really dedicated to ambushing me. Assuming the former I quickly picked up the flora and before it could even transform properly, chucked it off the cliff.
I dusted my hands and aimed a lightning spear at a puddle between the two remaining foliage in camouflage. When the spear made contact with the water it burst apart into countless sparks and incinerated the wild cucumbers. After that, I went up to the conspicuous wall I remembered and gave it a solid kick which scattered it into smoke. Which revealed the bonfire behind it.
[BONFIRE LIT]
I didn't rest, of course, I didn't need to. When I got done lighting the bonfire I headed down the route next to the glowing set of doors. I quickly diverted my path to grab a Large Soul of a Nameless Solider, after dispatching the weed boys surrounding it first of course.
After that, I continued on the path and kicked the fog door open before starting to walk as silently as possible. I did not want to deal with a 3-meter soldier made out of rock thank you.
Though I'm curious if I could take them out before they can wake up, unlike the game. I went up to the most isolated one silently and raised my hands. And as I swung down my hands I summoned the demon's great hammer in between my hands and down on the poor sleepin' fellas head.
*Crush!!!*
< You have slain 1x{Great Stone Knight} +600souls >
Nice. Then I guess both you and I know what this means huh?
I spent an hour silently departing every sleepy stone boy I could find and any wild bush trying to scream were quickly silenced by a sword to the face. It went surprisingly smoothly all things considered.
That was strange.
This is Lordran. Nothing ever goes smoothly here. But whatever, throw me a bone and I will take it in stride. After dispatching those I also took the partisan lying inside the chest, guarded by two sneks that couldn't withstand a singular lightning spear. Ironic considering they were guarding a spear.
The partisan was in all actuality a very good spear which I decided to take into my main loadout after I'm done upgrading it.
And lastly, I found the main thing I came here for. Actual armor of high quality. Ladies and gentlemen, I present you...
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< Elite Knight Set >
High-quality armor that likely belonged to an elite knight of Astora that went hollow.
--------------------
I quickly changed out of my current gear and equipped this in its place and man did it fit like a glove. No, even better than that, this felt like a second skin. Even the helmet didn't even feel like it hindered my vision. Just this armor made this trip worthwhile in my opinion.
But I wasn't done, this treasure trove still had offers for me. I went up to a very inconspicuous tree whose very existence brought me anger and grief. I firebombed the fake tree until it turned to dust and walked forward on the path it revealed.
I made my way through the area while swiftly disposing of any of the frog things with my newfound spear and hacked apart the second fucking tree in my path.
Already aware of the song and dance I hugged the right wall until I reached a passage with stairs leading upwards. I went up the stairs and followed the path until I encountered a Stone fella which I crushed the head of whilst it slumbered. After that, I continued until I reached a ledge that contained the ring that I had been looking for.
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<Wolf Ring>
One of the special rings granted to the four knights of Gwyn. The Wolf Ring belongs to Artorias the Abysswalker. Artorias had an unbendable will of steel, and was unmatched with a greatsword.
When worn this ring greatly increases the poise of its bearer.
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Although I could go for the grass crest shield I did not want to risk provoking the aquatic dragon bigger than an apartment building. And besides, I wasn't really itching for stamina recovery.
Because unlike the player character I don't get short of breath after swinging a sword 6 times.
Now that I had gotten all I had come for, it was time to enforce the law. Moonlight butter doesn't fly and this one was. That needed to be fixed. I went back to the broken tower and climbed up it until I reached a fog wall. Then I waited in front of it.
...
Nothing?
Guess I don't get challenged every day then. Who knew? Whelp, then this means I can pull every dirty trick in the book to bring down that shouldn't be flying thing. I stretched a bit, checked my equipment, and stepped through the fog.
And after a few moments, an ethereal-looking giant butterfly without a head or legs descended from one of the towers. In fact, this thing basically had nothing but a torso and wings as far as I could see. The most distinct part of it being the ring on its back.
The moment the Butterfly descended it started releasing soul arrows toward me. But I just stood still and the moment they were about to make contact with me I used force to scatter all of them rendering the attack useless.
Seeing the butterfly charge another spell I suddenly remembered that I had ranged options too. But instead of a lightning spear which takes a bit to charge and a bit of focus. I was instead going with the old reliable.
I summoned a brick and chucked it at the boss.
Thanks to my inhuman stats and maxed throwing skill the brick flew like an arrow and struck the butterfly dead center
*Thunk*
And thanks to the nonexistent poise of a floating butterfly its spell was interrupted as it momentarily staggered. I waited a bit and it tried to cast another spell again which I intercepted with a brick. And it happened again.
And again.
And again.
...
I never thought I would feel any kind of pity for any boss but I guess there is a first for everything huh? Because now it was just sad. Every time it tried to cast a spell it was met with a brick. It couldn't dodge either as it was pretty slow. So it was just stuck.
After about a few solid 10 minutes, the butterfly was looking pretty battered so I decided to put it out of its misery. I used {Deadman's blow: throw} to throw a war pick at it, which pierced through it.
[VICTORY ACHIEVED]
<You have slain 1x{Moonlight Butterfly} +10,000souls >
<You have received the {Soul of the Moonlight Butterfly} >
That's... all?
That was the most underwhelming thing I have experienced ever since I came to Lordran. Usually, I would have to spill blood shit, and tears to defeat a boss but...
I don't know how to describe it but this victory just felt... empty?
Regardless I pointed down. For the moonlight, butter had been returned to its rightful place.
The ground.
Anyway, I made my way up the tower the Moonlight Butterfly came from and retrieved the divine ember from the corpse of the divine blacksmith who actually looked different from Andre, unlike the game.
I went down the tower and went around a bit before finding the corpse of no longer flying butter and pocketing it. After that, I just bonewarded out and made my way back to the parish. After tussling with a few bushling I arrived at Andre's forge and greeted him.
''Hey, Andre. I think I might've found something you'd like''
Saying that I held out the divine ember. Upon seeing it Andre's eyes widened.
''My, that's a rare ember you have there. I've seen one of those before... It's the ember of a divine blacksmith. Might you consider leaving that with me? I could produce divine weapons with a flame such as that.''
''Sure, why not. It's not like I know how to use it.''
I left the ember with Andre which he thanked me for. After that, I went upstairs and sat down by the bonfire. Deciding to rest before cleaning up the Undead Parish and challenging the gargoyles.
It's gonna be a long day tomorrow, isn't it?
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