Bog Standard Isekai

Book 2. Chapter 22

The problem with life-changing conversations is that he never knew he was in one until it was too late. Brin had made all sorts of plans for the lies he could tell if anyone figured out that he was on track to be an [Illusionist]. He’d settled on the idea that he’d try to get everyone to believe that he was a glass-based [Warrior]. If he could demonstrate a lot of competence at hand-to-hand combat, especially against a real [Warrior] named Zilly, he’d be able to make the lie stick.

There was only one problem: He didn’t want to lie to Davi. Lying to everyone and then letting Davi believe it too by omission was one thing. Straight up lying to his face was another.

He picked up his lute and strummed the first few chords to a Green Day song. A song about loneliness and broken dreams. In the silence left after Gustaff’s death, this song seemed to get stuck in his head more and more.

The lute was not a guitar. Lutes were brighter and higher pitched, built for piercing through the thrum of a crowded tavern or marketplace, but one thing Brin had noticed was that when he played a lute as if it were a guitar, it really sounded very similar.

He stopped halfway through and threw the instrument down on his bed.

Davi had asked his question a while ago now, and it still hung in the air, waiting to be answered.

“I’m hoping to get [Illusionist] at level twenty. With the level I got this morning, I’m only three away,” said Brin. “Is it really that obvious? Does everyone know?”

“You’re at level seventeen? How are you shooting up like that?” Davi asked.

“I’ve got [Memories of Glass] and it’s letting me make innovations that should’ve taken years to learn. Plus I fought some undead,” said Brin. He used [Inspect] and saw that Davi was at level 13. That was absurdly high, considering Davi didn’t have any of Brin’s advantages. “You’re not doing too bad, either.”

“That’s true. That’s why it’s so–”

“Hold up. Now answer my question. The [Illusionist] Class only works in a fight if no one knows you have it. How screwed am I?”

Davi shrugged. “I don’t know. Most [Glassers] stay [Glassers], you know? I only know about it from the stories even though there aren’t a lot of stories about [Illusionists]. They’re kind of like [Bards] in that way. They tell stories, they aren’t in them. But I did read one about a [Glasser]-turned-[Illusionist] who tried to win the heart of a princess.”

“Oh? And how did the hero do it in that story?”

“The hero impressed the princess by hunting a gigantic boar. The [Illusionist] was the bad guy, but they killed him pretty easily once they figured out what he was.”

“See what I’m working with here?”

“I won’t tell anyone,” said Davi.

Brin shook his head. “I know that. But if you can figure it out, why can’t everyone?”

“Everyone doesn't know you like I do. I think you’re probably fine. Also, people from Hammon’s Bog don’t go anywhere else. If you hide your status when you leave town no one will know you started as a [Glasser]. So that’s all you need? Just get to level 20?”

Brin shrugged. “I think I need to put on a magic show.”

“Oh, you have glass magic, right? I have mostly emotion stuff, but I can do things with sound, too,” said Davi.

“No, not real magic. Where I come from, there are some people who have the hobby of pretending to do magic when really it’s just sleight of hand,” said Brin. “I used to practice it a little when… when I was younger, and I’ve got a few things I still know how to do.”

“Hm. I could see why that would lead to [Illusionist]. To earn it, you have to make it look like you already have it,” said Davi.

Davi didn’t look dumb despite the insecurities he carried, and Brin didn’t think he was dumb, but it still took him off-guard when the big guy threw out such an insightful comment like that.

“I’d never thought of it that way,” said Brin.

“Come to dinner tonight. You can do a magic show for the family. I could get you up on stage at the public house, but I think at that point it would be pretty obvious to everyone what Class you’re aiming for.”

Brin thought for a moment. This was pretty last minute. When he said he used to practice it a little, he meant a little. Just one of a multitude of passing hobbies that he’d given up on when it was time to start spending money on it. But he could still do the French Drop like nobody’s business, and the rope trick was pretty simple. This… might actually be possible. “You know what? Yeah, I’ll do it. Maybe this is exactly what I need.”

They jammed a little longer before Davi had to go. As soon as he left, Brin jumped from his bed and started the things he’d need.

He didn’t have much time to prepare, but he didn’t need much. A lot of the basic magic tricks were just about practicing it enough that you could make it look natural. He was a little out of practice, but he had high enough Dexterity that things like that were never as hard as they should be.

He had a couple coins for coin tricks, grabbed a few napkins just in case they weren’t at the dinner table and found a couple feet of rope, but really what he needed was a box. It would probably be fine without it, but if he could throw something together in the couple hours before dinner, it would really make his show shine.

He was rummaging around in the cellar when Hogg found him.

“You uh… you doing ok there, Brin?” Hogg leaned against the doorframe, silhouetted against the afternoon sun behind him.

“I’m doing fine. You’re the one that almost died yesterday. I should be asking you if you’re doing ok.” He paused and put down the old jewelry box that he’d been examining. No jewelry, but a pretty nice box. “Actually, hold on. Are you doing ok?”

“I’m fine. Don’t worry about me. You don’t have to....” Hogg sighed. He came down the steps and then walked to the enchanted circle and sat down.

Out of curiosity, Brin followed him.

To his surprise, Hogg actually answered his question. “The worst part is waking up in the morning with nothing to do. A fight like that yesterday makes me expect an even bigger one today, but then it doesn’t come so I’m jittery and on edge. I’ve been here before, though. A hundred times. It’ll pass.”

He sat still for a moment, and then said, “Well?”

“Well, what? I think you’re right. It’ll pass. Maybe if you found a project or something to–”

“No, that’s not what I meant. I talked about my emotions like a damn sissy. Now it’s your turn,” said Hogg. “Well?”

Brin smiled. “Fair enough. I really am doing ok, though. I’ve been feeling a lot better. [Meditation] has really helped me compartmentalize the new memories.”

“But then today in Ademir’s shop…” Hogg said leadingly.

“How do you still know everything that happens? It’s not fair. Yeah, I had a pretty strong memory sneak up on me, but it was the first one in a while.”

“It’s not just that,” said Hogg. “Have you noticed that you tend to bury yourself with work when you get stressed? I’m worried that you’re pulling yourself in too many directions. You have the workouts with Davi, making glass with Ademir, Language with Chamylla, practicing the lute in your free time which is non-existent, fixing your brain to handle all those memories, spear practice with me, although now I’m guessing you’ll want to switch back to swords for this week.”

“If you don’t mind.”

“Not at all,” said Hogg. “But then on top of that now you want to start training your mental resistance. Not to mention that you’re still trying to learn who the other five [Witches] are.”

“Putting it all that way, it does start to sound like a lot.”

“You promised me that after System Day you’d slow down and start living your life. You need to simplify.”

“But all of that stuff needs to get done!” said Brin.

“Prioritize. What’s your number one priority?”

“The [Witches]. If we don’t figure that out, everyone dies so none of the rest of it matters,” said Brin.

Hogg shook his head in disgust. “There’s nothing you can do to help with that. The detective work I’ve been having you do is just a way to capitalize on the situation in order to level up your [Inspect] Skill. But there’s literally zero chance your [Inspect] is going to outlevel mine anytime soon. Your biggest advantage is [Know What’s Real], and that’s not a leveling Skill. I’d put investigating the [Witches] as your lowest priority.”

“Then what’s my highest priority?” He thought about it for a second, then answered his own question. “[Meditation]. I can work on integrating my [Memories of Glass] and also train my mental resistance at the same time.”

“Ok, I was going to say your number one priority is to get your head right, so we’re pretty close to the same page. I also want you to spend some time every day doing something fun. Spend time with your friends.”

“Really? My number one priority isn’t to train as hard as I can so that I’ll survive when this situation inevitably explodes in all of our faces?” asked Brin, only half-sarcastically.

“No. Because it’s not your job to make sure you survive that. It’s mine. And I agree with you, that things are going to get worse for Hammon’s Bog before they get better. That’s why you need to spend these relatively peaceful days in rest and relaxation, because we don’t know how long they’ll last. Here’s what I have in mind for your new schedule. Mornings with Davi. After that, you’ll alternate days between Ademir and Chamylla. You’re already leveling [Glasser] at a breakneck pace, so that could stand to slow down a bit. Ademir’s been doing a frankly outstanding job with you–”

“I agree.”

“--so I’ll tell him he deserves more time on his own projects. He’d spend all day with those creepy dolls of his if he could, you know.”

“Yeah, what’s with that?”

“Not my place to say,” said Hogg.

“Ok, hold up. About Ademir. I was going to check this with Calisto, but I’ll just ask you since you’re here. If I were to go to Calisto and ask him if he has a tonic that can fix baldness, what would he say?”

Hogg’s face scrunched up. He looked like he wanted to spit on the floor in disgust, but it was his floor so he didn’t. “He’d say that his hair tonic isn’t very effective, and he hasn’t spent any time improving it since he became an [Alchemist]. He has bigger priorities.”

That wasn’t actually the answer Brin had been expecting. He’d assumed that Ademir had been telling the truth when he said that Calisto had come up with the solution. Sure, the [Witch] ability to transform their bodies was another possibility, but that had been a long shot. Barely worth verifying, although now he was glad he had.

“Uh huh. Ademir’s a [Witch],” said Brin.

“Just because his hair is growing back in? You sure? Maybe he just purchased a favor from a [Witch].”

“The fact that you’re not already rubbing my face in my loss means I’m right,” said Brin.

Hogg sighed. “Ademir’s a [Witch].”

“Why do you have me hanging out with so many [Witches]? I thought I should avoid taking their hospitality!”

“What I said was that if you want to beat a [Witch] you need a [Witch] of your own. I hoped that working with Ademir would raise his opinion of you and he’d be more willing to defend you when the time came. Well done on that, by the way; he thinks the world of you.”

“He does?”

“Absolutely. That’s three down, but I don’t have any coins on me so you’ll have to wait. Now can we get back to the matter at hand? Your schedule. After your time with either Chamylla or Ademir, you can do one hour of [Meditation]. After that, you have the afternoon free. You are not to do any work in that time, do you understand? We’ll train you up with swords for a few hours around dusk.”

Brin leaned back, thinking it over. Was it really ok for him to just… relax?

“This is all your choice; I’m just making a suggestion. You’re an adult, in both worlds. Although, in our world that’s more of a technicality. We still see new adults as kids.”

“It’s like that in my world, too.”

“Really? At eighteen?”

Brin shrugged. “The schedule sounds good to me.”

“Good. So what’s next? Some kind of magic show with Davi’s family?”

“Yeah,” said Brin. “Actually, can you help me find a box?”

“What kind of box?”

Brin described what he needed, and Hogg seemed to be quite taken with the idea. Before Brin could stop him, he dashed out the door to go talk to some [Woodworker] he knew. He returned a half hour later with the box.

The box was a complete work of art for something that had been thrown together in a half hour. It had finely carved vines and flowers trimming the edges, and images of stars and moons on the sides to make it look mysterious. The whole thing had a glossy sheen from a lacquer that was already dry and it didn’t even smell. It was definitely the work of a high-level crafter.

It had a door on the front and on top, and a wooden slat diagonal between the two. That part was supposed to be a mirror.

“I thought about that,” said Hogg. “The words you want are >. You’re going to use [Summon Glass] and form a mental image of covering this part with a mirror glaze.”

It took Brin a couple tries to get the words right. It was a more complicated use of the language than he’d ever tried before, and another half-hour of his limited prep time went into getting them just right. When he was ready, he practiced on a piece of bark paper first. The mirror came easily, covering the paper with a thin coating of mirrored glass. The glass was so thin he could still bend the paper, almost like it had been spray-painted on, but of course bending it cracked the glass and ruined the mirror.

Still, hand-mirrors were pretty expensive and he could make them pretty easily, now. It hadn’t even taken much mana, which was a relief, because he’d spent almost all his mana crafting that morning and not much had regenerated.

He used most of the rest of it coating the diagonal slat inside the box. It was magical, literally and figuratively, to watch the mirrored glass appear on the surface of the wood.

When he was finished, the illusion was perfect. Opening the front door revealed what looked like a completely empty box. He put some coins, a ball, and some napkins inside the box. It was ready.

“Actually, where’s Marksi?” Brin asked. As soon as he did, Marksi slithered into view. The little guy had taken to wandering off, but it must be to practice his stealth skills because he always seemed to be nearby when Brin asked for him.

“Alright, this is going to be a bit complicated, but I think you can handle it. Do you want to help me put on a show?”

Marksi lit up the scales across his back in a dazzling display of color. He was onboard.

A few hours later, it was time for the show. Dinner with the Pimentals went about how it always did, in a roar of cheerful conversation. They ate beef roast and boiled mato. Boiling the mato sapped all the flavor out of it, which was definitely a plus.

The older sisters cleared the plates away, and then Alvir announced. “So. I believe Brin has a show for us. Is that right, Brin?”

“That’s right!” said Brin. He narrowed his eyes mysteriously, and made an extra effort to talk with his hands. “Prepare to enter the dangerous and mysterious world… of magic!”

Bruna squealed a high pitched, “Hee!” She clamped a hand over her mouth, trying and failing to contain a bout of laughter.

Brin narrowed his eyes. “The world of magic is wondrous…” He held up a copper coin, showing it to everyone. He carefully put it in his other hand, but did the French Drop and kept it in the first hand. He tapped the empty hand with a table knife a couple times. “... and mysterious!” He opened his hand.

He hadn’t known what to expect, but that little trick floored them. The girls gasped, and little Yon stood up from his chair, eyes wide. Brin reached over and pretended to produce the coin again from Yon’s ear. He flinched in shock, but then when he saw the coin again, he smiled. Brin pressed it into his hands.

He did a cup trick next. This was the typical shell game that swindlers used, only in Brin’s version, he never actually put the coin in the cups. He wanted a trick that utilized sound, which is why he didn’t use a ball. He pretended to put the coin in the bottom of the cup, but then palmed it right out. Then when he slammed the cup on the table, he used his other hand to slap a coin on the underside of the table so that everyone would hear the sound. He even scraped the coin when he moved the cup. He switched the cups around as fast as he could, which was tricky with only one hand. When he asked them to guess, everyone pointed at the same cup, which was the right answer. He lifted it, and it was empty. Then he lifted the other two. Empty as well.

Everyone cheered, utterly dumbfounded. Even Bruna looked a little impressed, although Alvir started to look a little nervous.

He sighed in mental relief that this was actually working. Turns out people were the same no matter where you go, even another world. People didn’t fall for magic tricks because they were dumb; it was actually the opposite. Once you’ve seen someone put something from one hand into another, your brain starts to recognize it and make a shortcut. Your brain notices the tension in the hand holding the object move to the other hand and makes an inference, even if you don’t actually see the object in question. Magic tricks don’t rely on the idea that people can’t see what you’re doing, they rely on the fact that they won’t.

He did the magic rope next. This trick was all about making it look like he was cutting a rope and then magically putting it back together again. The trick was holding the rope in a certain way to make it look like he was cutting the middle when actually he was cutting the ends.

They were polite about this one, but he could tell they weren’t as impressed as his disappearing coin trick, which was funny because they probably thought that he’d just bought a self-repairing rope from Tawna.

The trick ended by tying the little piece of the rope around the bigger one while making it look like he was tying the two ends together. When he had one of Davi’s older sisters grab the knot and slide it all the way off the rope, they were suitably impressed again.

It was time for the grand finale. He walked out to the front room and grabbed the box from the place he’d left it.

Their eyes followed the box as it entered the room. They knew it was going to do something special. He felt both Alvir and Bruna’s eyes on his hands; he could practically feel their determination to figure out how he was doing it this time.

He set the box on the table, and then made a big show about rolling up his sleeves. When he was a kid, he always thought that the magician was hiding everything up his sleeves, and from the look on Davi’s younger brothers’ faces, they’d been thinking the same thing.

“Now this is a magic box. Completely empty as you can see…” Brin kept up the magician monologue as he showed them the features of the box. He opened both lids, the one in front and the one on the side, and “proved” it was empty by putting both his hands in at the same time. Where they thought they were seeing the fingers of his left hand it was actually the reflection of the right hand. He’d had to spend a few minutes practicing that in front of another mirror to make sure it was believable.

Then he closed the front lid, dropped some coins from his pocket into the top. He dropped them in the top door, and then opened the front door again. To their eyes, it looked like it was still completely empty.

“Ta da!”

Davi laughed in delight with his younger brothers. His sisters smiled, a tad nervously perhaps, while Alvir made no effort to hide a perplexed frown. Bruna smiled, though she was looking at the delight on her boys’ faces.

Brin closed the front door again, and then started pulling things out. He pulled the same coins out again, then reiterated that his sleeves were still pulled up, and started to take out everything else. A ball. A handkerchief, and then another and another. Even more coins.

The rest of the family grew more and more excited, but Alvir’s frown deepened. “A bag of holding. It’s got to be. That’s an expensive–”

“It’s not a bag of holding, and I’ll prove it,” said Brin. “But first, let’s make sure it’s really a box.”

He closed both doors and then picked the box up, showing them that there were no hidden compartments or holes. He let the littlest, Yon, knock on the bottom and the back to be sure it was solid wood. Brin opened the top again, narrating how good a job they’d done on the finishing work, but this time the top door was facing them, blocking the view. Marksi took that brief moment to rush up from underneath Brin’s shirt and into the box. He moved so silently that Brin barely saw him, and there was no sound even though Marksi had to lift the mirror to get underneath it.

He closed the door and then spun it around. “And here’s the proof. This isn’t a bag of holding, because bags of holding can’t hold living things.” Actually, he’d never really asked Hogg if that was true, and no one else could afford them. It sounded like it should be true.

He opened the front door. Marksi leapt out, quick as a bat out of hell. The speed was mostly so that no one would notice Marksi’s reflection inside the box from the mirror, but also because Marksi loved the limelight.

Yon screamed in alarm, but it changed to a laugh when he noticed it was just Marksi. “I was wondering where he was. Usually he comes with you!”

The rest of the family applauded, but Alvir’s expression grew darker. “You shouldn’t have done that to Marksi. That was very dangerous, Brin.”

Brin shook his head. “A magician never reveals his secrets, but I promise it wasn’t a bag of holding, and it definitely wasn’t dangerous.”

Congratulations! Through training you have increased the following attribute: Dexterity +1

Alert! New Class option available: Upgrade to Illusionist will be unlocked at level 20.

Brin gave himself a silent cheer. Meanwhile, Marksi marched up and down the table, eating up all the excitement, the happy little prima donna.

Alvir’s frown didn’t change. Well, Brin had already gotten what he needed out of this. Davi’s dad had always been nice to him; there was no reason he couldn’t ease his mind.

“Alright, alright, come take a look.” He held up the box.

Alvir looked side to side, and Bruna gave him a gentle nudge. “Fine.”

Brin opened the front door and told Alvir to look closely. Alvir leaned in slowly, as if afraid that another Marksi was going to spring out of nowhere at him.

“Do you see it yet?” asked Brin.

Alvir frowned, squinting his eyes.

“Put your hand in,” said Brin.

Alvir shot him a cross look, then slowly put a finger into the box. He touched the mirror, and all at once it hit him. His face broke out into a wide grin.

“What is it?” asked Yon.

“Come take a look,” said Alvir, laughing in relief.

“See dear? It’s like I told you. People hate to be lied to, but they love to be tricked,” said Bruna. An ominous statement, especially since Brin had no idea if Alvir knew she was a [Witch].

Alvir chuckled. “It just goes to show. Some things aren’t so scary once you start to understand them.”

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