Dead Man's Harem. Since I can't kill myself, I'll find other ways to be happy.

Chapter 3: F-cup rank adventurer

It took him roughly twenty minutes to get to the town entrance. Limping his way through the gate, Devon ignored the stares of humans and beastfolk, as he clutched the gaping wound on his chest and wandered down the market aisle.

His wound was closing faster than he expected, too, as if heaven itself was taunting him, telling him that he didn't have the luxury to choose to die.

"Mister, why don't you spend some time with me here~" a female voice came from the side.

Devon turned his head and saw that it was a girl with pointed ears and giant breasts, wearing a seductively revealing witch robe dress. She was standing in front of a brothel, with the name Erika's Sex Shop emblazened on a fancy sign.

Figuring that he really didn't have much else to lose, Devon limped over to the elf girl, whose soft eyes widened a bit in fear when she saw the mess of blood all over his clothes, although his wound had closed by now.

"How much for a night with you?" Devon said with a somewhat disinterested tone. Since he couldn't kill himself, he figured that he might as well try to enjoy himself in whatever depraved way possible, although he wasn't sure that he was still capable of enjoying much of anything anymore.

"U-um since I'm the owner, three thousand gold for a night with me, but there are other girls here at l-lower rates" The elf prostitute's ears twitched shyly as she spoke.

"I see," came Devon's terse reply. He turned back around, deciding to come back later after he made some money.

Leaving the elf girl in a daze, Devon turned around and headed towards the town square, where there was a giant guild building. He figured that since he wasn't able to die, it was best to at least try to adopt a pain minimization heuristic, to avoid intense hunger pangs and other short term miseries. And possibly spend a night with that busty elf girl.

But first, he needed a steady source of income. Walking into the guild center, Devon headed to the reception desk while folding a bit of cloth over his wound to make it unnoticeable.

"Hi and welcome to the adventurer's guild! Have you registered with us before?" a pretty bunnygirl receptionist said with a bow to Devon.

"No need a card," he replied, looking up at the services they provided which included issuing adventurer cards.

"Alright, wait just one moment," she replied, taking out a piece of parchment and a magically laminated metal card the size of a credit card. "What's your name?

"Devon. Devon Hall."

"Oookay. And do you wish to take the adventurer rank test, or will you just start out as an F-rank adventurer?"

"Just start me out as F-rank, please."

The receptionist nodded, scribbling onto her notepad. "And your class?"

"Dead man walking."

The receptionist's bunny ears twitched. "Um dead man walking?"

Devon nodded.

"Are you sure you want that to be your class? It might be hard to find work if you don't properly list your class"

"Never mind then, just put warrior then." Devon didn't see any benefit from making a fuss about putting his correct class if it was only a hindrance to his goals.

The bunny girl nodded, rolling up the parchment and putting it in a compartment behind her. She tapped a mechanism, and a newly minted metal adventurer's card popped out.

"Here's your adventurer's card~" she said sweetly.

"Thank you ma'am. Can I ask how to find work around here?"

The bunny girl receptionist giggled and leaned in to whisper to Devon. "Actually, there's something special you can do since you're quite handsome and charming." Pushing a few buttons on the mechanical machine behind her, a black metal card popped out. "This is the key to the backroom. You can find some more interesting work there, it's just around the back of this guild behind that curtain over there. I'm sure you'll find the work intriguing, if you know what I mean~"

The receptionist pointed towards an unassuming dirty curtain on the other end of the adventurer's guild. "And, if you want some more normal jobs, the guild bulletin is right there where that crowd of adventurers are."

Devon nodded in thanks, taking the black card from here. "I'll look for you again if I need any help."

"Any time~" replied the bunny girl receptionist with a mischievous grin on her face.

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