Chapter 1531 - 1531 Lake Break Part 3
--- Kat ---
It was a bit later and everyone had come back for food. There were more plans to relax after this, but for now? It was time to enjoy the feast. Kat and Kamiko had done up three tables worth of food without any expectation it would all be eaten. There was plenty of fish for Lily, jelly for Kamiko and a mix of everything else for the rest of the group.
Kat had even managed to sneakily make up a fancy ice cream and jelly dish for Kamiko. It was mostly a display piece, as other then ice cream and jelly it just had a few candies placed onto it so it wasn't a culinary masterpiece of any sort.
Everyone dug in, even Kat. After the fight she'd continued to be hungrier then normal on average but that was really to be expected. She'd been in a very serious fight and then spent days on more physical activities. Hunter kept a much more 'normal' appetite, though she also tended to be quite a bit more physically active then Kat herself.
Kamiko's larger meals could probably be put down to the fact she just ate jelly most of the time. *Honestly if it wasn't for that special brand her parents found I'd force her to eat something else because there's no way that would be healthy under normal circumstances.*
Minor complaints about Kamiko's diet aside everyone had a good time with lunch. It was a nice atmosphere, and it allowed for Kamiko to be bold enough to ask Bower "What… um… what do you plan to do now?"
"What do you mean? Got a drake to find still," said Bower with a chuckle.
Kamiko pouted at Bower's laughter. "I know it's become a bit of a joke… but that's not what I meant. I mean… what are you going to do when you do go back home? You… you said you'd do more training and hanging around… but you don't seem all that happy. And I mean… with the quest basically done and you likely to survive for a good time yet… um… yeah what are you thinking of doing?"
Bower let out a long sigh as he grabbed his glass of juice. No alcohol had been set at the table for the old hunter. If asked, Kat and Kamiko would say the risk of monsters attacking was still a bit too high because they were in a bubble. In truth, neither wanted to bother working out if the alcohol was safe for Bower to drink. "Don't ask the easy questions do ya lass?"
Bower glanced around the table as everyone slowed their eating to pay more attention. Once it was clear to Bower he was going to be stuck as the centre of attention until he gave a few answers he let out a sigh before beginning to speak. "I don't really know. I've been drifting for a long time. Doing a lot of the same things over and over.
I wouldn't call them useless or annoying just… unsatisfying I suppose.
"I had such pride in my first few batches of hunters. I saw a group of kids that would no doubt rise above me one day and take the world by storm… and they just didn't.
Well, if you want to get technical there are a few hunters that left for greener pastures and might have done something impressive, but they never sent word back if they're still alive so that's… perhaps even sadder then the idea they died out there. Especially when the two I have in mind have parents still living on my street.
"Don't get me wrong, I've got a few promising hopefuls that are better hunters then I am right now… but being better than I am while I'm old and weary is nothing impressive. If I just wanted someone to equal my skill I wouldn't have bothered teaching 'em everything I know. They're the younger generation they're meant to be better, faster, stronger. Ready to take on the world… and none truly were.
"So my interest in training has been flagging a good deal. So many hunters that retire and start families once they make good enough money hunting in and around the mist. Get enough to retire, or leave town and open a store or something… and just don't bother getting stronger.
"Which I know is a hard ask. I don't want to pretend I thought every kid would go out and change the world… but I've taught hundreds of hunters and I guess I'd just hoped that at least one would make a mark on the world now I'm too old to do it myself.
"Then there's the family. They seem to have forgotten about their old grandad. I get it, most of my kids are dead, and quite a few of my grandkids are gone as well… but the family is still alive. I still send letters and pay off the adventurer's guild to give me updates. Don't here back from them though. Even after paying an old friend's daughter to watch and confirm the letter was delivered… nothing.
"I don't mean to sound ungrateful here… but I put in my time. I send them letters with the stories I remember alongside a bit of gold I have lying around. It's not like I'm ever going to run out. My investments in a couple of merchant houses keep bringing in more then there's the hunting…
"So it's not about the money to me… but the fact that even though I provide for them, they can't be bothered to so much as write back. I even paid the courier to have any letters brought back for me! Only worked the twice. Not sure if the couriers just assumed they'd know I was paying after that… or if it was mentioned and they still didn't care,"
Bower shifted in his chair which let out a creaking noise. Then he shifted again and Kat realised it wasn't the chair as Bower let out a long rattling sigh. "Taking out the drake really was a great way to cement my legacy. A way to pass on without being a coward about it. Oh don't get me wrong, I have no death with… but I don't know that I find all that much joy in the life I have anymore.
"I heard a few people talking about death as just another stage in a soul's journey. Maybe that's true… maybe it's not but I can say that life has become quite painful. In the literal sense that is, not the metaphorical one. Old injuries acting up, bones degrading. Not to get too morbid or into the details I'm sure ya don't want to here but it's not been a great time.
"And sure I'm fine now. I say it's painful, but I'm used to pain. I can ignore this much… but how long can I continue to do so?" Bower drained the last of his juice and took a short break. "Haaaa… it's one of those things I suppose. I'm getting old, and my body is breaking down. I accepted it at the start but I ask, how much do I have to accept?
And if I just continue to exist… will I get to the point my body really breaks down? What about my mind?
"I may be in really good condition for my age but I've had friends who weren't so lucky. My wife's body practically fell apart in her final days. My old best friend? He lost his mind, forgetting more and more things as time went on. Another good friend of mine started having seizures randomly, and while his mind was fine, and his body was usually fine…
"The risk was always there. What if he was out hunting when he had a seizure? Would he survive long enough for it to pass? I'll never know, because he decided to pick up a boat and a crew, sailing off into the sunset. Told me it would be his last big adventure one way or another, and that I shouldn't expect to see him again…
"So I suppose I'm left wondering if I should do something similar ya know? I guess I already intended it… but now everything is safe? And I know that I'll survive for quite a few more years yet? I worry. I want to go out on my own terms… but I feel like throwing myself off a cliff or something would just be giving up. I'm not a young man anymore so I can't just sign up for a cause either.
It wouldn't be for the right reason, nor really on my terms,"
"Sorry I had to bring the mood down kiddos," finished Bower with a sad smile, after a few moments of silence.
"I… I don't want to say I'm sorry for asking Mr Bower," said Kamiko. "My Mum is a doctor and I know a fair bit about old patients… and deciding what to do is never easy. Some people hold on stubbornly, just to stick around… others find a way to die painlessly. It's… not a nice topic and I was really hoping you had a plan…"
"Sorry lass. I have to say I'm quite lost at the moment," said Bower with a smile.
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