Guide on How to Fail at Online Dating

Chapter 91 - Xiao Jing ya: I fucking gave birth prematurely!!!

Edited by Divetus

This week, their server was in testing mode, so Christmas events were released a week in advance. Xiang Huaizhi casually recorded a video, and after the battle, he turned off the recording.

“I have classes all of tomorrow,” Xiang Huaizhi said.

The other party was quiet for a bit before replying, “Ah, I have no classes tomorrow.”

“I know.” Xiang Huaizhi said, “The Christmas events have titles, do you want them?”

“I’m fine with anything… These titles seem to come with experience buffs?”

Xiang Huaizhi let out an “en” sound, “Wait until I come back in the evening, and I’ll take you to do them.”

After finishing the couple’s quests and dailies, Xiang Huaizhi took off his headphones and slightly stretched his body.

Lu Hang looked back and gave him an envious look. “Is this the joys of being the top student ma?”

It was nearly time for exams, so Lu Hang took the time to study a bit while waiting for the instance to open.

He’d rather die than have to repeat a course…

Just thinking of that scenario, Lu Hang was scared. He folded his hands and bowed a few times to Xiang Huaizhi. “Top student, bless me to not fail…”

“It’s no use worshipping me. It’s already the end of the term, and you’re still skipping class. No one can save you.” Xiang Huaizhi said mercilessly.

“Can you blame me? It’s my warm bed’s fault,” Lu Hang muttered. He turned around and opened up the school’s QQ group.

“Holy shit?” As Lu Hang saw what was being discussed, he became stunned. “Why is someone saying in the group chat that you have a girlfriend now?”

Xiang Huaizhi’s actions slightly paused, and then he let out a light “en” sound.

“Damn it! This person is using Anonymous mode, it’s probably all nonsense…” In the middle of Lu Hang’s speech, he stopped. It took him a long time to recompose himself.. “Did I hallucinate what you said just now?”

“No.” Xiang Huaizhi said.

“…”

Lu Hang looked at him in shock. “She’s—”

“In our school, one year below us.” Before he could finish his question, Xiang Huaizhi had already opened his mouth to give answers.

Lu Hang: “…”

Lu Hang asked, “Name?”

Xiang Huaizhi and Lu Hang looked at each other for a while, and then Xiang Huaizhi’s lower lip curled up. “Confidential.”

Lu Hang: “…”

Time for an early death.

Lu Hang absently finished the 20 person instance. His brain was still digesting the information from just now, and his curiosity had swelled until it was about to explode.

In the end, just who was this sacred small female junior?

At the end of the instance, Lu Hang flew to the Unknown Realm, planning to see the new Christmas apparel.

Yet as a result, he ended up seeing two familiar figures pass by him.

Yearning For was leading Xiao Tianjing, and he didn’t even turn his head before disappearing into the transporter.

Lu Hang stood in place for a while, then opened up his friends list, and looked at Xiao Tianjing’s profile picture and personal signature with sympathetic eyes.

Alas.

What a miserable girl.

Although Lu Hang loved to flirt with girls, he was single-minded and had never cheated on anyone before. He had always looked down upon such people before.

But now that it was happening with his own bro——

All humans essentially had double standards.

Which man wouldn’t make mistakes?

After 12 o’clock, Jing Huan went home to take supplements and was just preparing to log-off when his friends’ notifications suddenly lit up.

[Unknown Realm Shopkeeper: Congratulations, young hero! Long Road Ahead has gifted you a “green straw hat“. Please go to Unknown Realm (118, 29) to collect your new clothes! ]

Jing Huan’s movements grew sluggish, and he read the notification again.

[Friend] Xiao Tianjing: ?

[Friend] Long Road Ahead: ….

[Friend] Xiao Tianjing: Did you send this to the wrong person?

[Friend] Long Road Ahead: No mistake, it’s a Christmas present for you.

[Friend] Xiao Tianjing: … Oh, thank you.

Lu Hang looked at her reply and sighed again.

Did you think this was just a simple little green hat?

No, this was my last shred of conscience.

Lu Hang had just wanted to go to Fairyland to afk when a system notification popped up.

[Unknown Realm Shopkeeper: Congratulations, young hero! Xiao Tianjing has gifted you a “reindeer jingle bell”. Please go to Unknown Realm (118, 29) to collect your new clothes! ]

[Friend] Xiao Tianjing: Return gift. ^^

Lu Hang: “…”

His roommate was a real slag.

Jing Huan turned off the computer and returned to bed only to find that his dorm group chat had @him a ton of times.

It was Lu Wenhao, who finally realized that he was going to have final exams in less than half a month, and he was currently crazily asking people to go to the library with him. Jing Huan was his number one pick.

Last year, Jing Huan hadn’t studied much, since he had a strong learning ability. After he abandoned gaming in high school, he had broken away from the class’ bottom rankings.

But this time was different.

During this period of time, he had become addicted to gaming again. He had grown too lax. He glanced at the syllabus sent out today and didn’t recognize any of it.

So, he promised Lu Wenhao to spend the weekend with him in the library.

Just after he finished chatting, his cellphone gently vibrated in his palm. Jing Huan saw the “1” notification in the upper left corner, and his heart leaped. He immediately closed the dorm group chat.

Xiang: The child will come out tomorrow.

Xiao Jing ya: [nodding] Probably around 7 p.m.

Xiang: En, wait for me to finish class.

Xiao Jing ya: Okay.

Jing Huan laid on the bed, staring intently at his chat interface with Xiang Huaizhi.

He hadn’t really thought anything about it before.

But once he had these kinds of thoughts, he suddenly found that they hadn’t come out of nowhere, that there had been traces of them all along.

Now, for example, when he saw the words “the other party is typing” in the chat box, he didn’t want to look at anyone else’s messages to him.

The next day, Jing Huan didn’t get up until noon. When he woke up, he was so hungry that his stomach was uncomfortable, so he immediately ordered takeout to save his life.

He got up and logged into the game. He wanted to drag his account over to Fairyland to afk, and then study. However, as soon as he logged into his account, a private chat message popped up in the chat channel.

[Private] Immortal Mengmeng: Original person?

[Private] Xiao Tianjing: No.

[Private] Immortal Mengmeng: I know it’s you. I have something to tell you.

Jing Huan rolled his eyes and had just wanted to send over a cutesy emoticon, but then he thought about it—he was no longer trying to seduce Yearning For, why should he continue pretending to act cute?

[Private] Xiao Tianjing: [GTFO]

[Private] Immortal Mengmeng: …

[Private] Immortal Mengmeng: What I’m going to say, you’re not going to like hearing.

[Private] Xiao Tianjing: You know that I’m not going to like it but you’re still going to say it, do you feel like you owe me or something?

[Private] Immortal Mengmeng: ???

Jing Huan moved his mouse down, preparing to block the private chat channel.

[Private] Immortal Mengmeng: Yearning For has a girlfriend in real life now!

Jing Huan’s fingertips froze.

[Private] Xiao Tianjing: ?

[Private] Immortal Mengmeng: I’m telling the truth. Yesterday, my friend and Long Road Ahead were doing instances together. When Long Road Ahead was chatting with him, he didn’t turn off his mic, and she heard everything.

Jing Huan sipped his freshly brewed coffee.

[Private] Xiao Tianjing: Oh? You think I’ll believe that? If you have the ability, please be specific.

[Private] Immortal Mengmeng: Hehe, the girl goes to the same school as him and is one year lower.

[Private] Xiao Tianjing: That’s all? Nothing else?

[Private] Immortal Mengmeng: I have a recording here. You can listen to it via WeChat.

[Private] Xiao Tianjing: [shock] [sadness] [tears]….

[Private] Xiao Tianjing: No way, I don’t believe it!!

The corner of Immortal Mengmeng’s mouth turned up. She had specifically come to talk about this matter to upset Xiao Tianjing.

[Private] Immortal Mengmeng: Well, that’s just how in-game relationships work. Don’t think that he likes you because he spent so much money on the wedding. In fact, he’s just using you to kill some time.

[Private] Xiao Tianjing: [covers her mouth and cries]

[Private] Immortal Mengmeng: It’s okay. You haven’t bound yourselves as Eternal Lovers. Now that you can see how he really is, you can promptly stop wasting time and just divorce him.

[Private] Xiao Tianjing: Ah?

[Private] Xiao Tianjing: How could I divorce him?!

[Private] Immortal Mengmeng: ?

[Private] Xiao Tianjing: No matter how a man plays around when he is cheating, he’ll definitely return to his family in the end. I’m willing to wait for him.

[Private] Immortal Mengmeng: ?????

[Private] Immortal Mengmeng: You two are just in an in-game relationship ah! How could you be better than his real life girlfriend?! And maybe, they already got together a long time ago, so actually, you’re the other woman??

[Private] Xiao Tianjing: So what? I’m willing to carry all the ill names on my back for him.

[Private] Immortal Mengmeng: …

[Private] Immortal Mengmeng: Meimei, is it worth all this trouble…

[Private] Xiao Tianjing: Jiejie, no need to talk anymore, I’ve made up my mind.

After chatting with Immortal Mengmeng for a while, Jing Huan’s sleepiness was completely gone.

Leaving this sentence behind, he directly blocked the private chat channel. At the thought of Immortal Mengmeng being struck dumb into astonishment in front of her computer screen, he couldn’t help wanting to laugh.

Jing Huan thought about whether to go out in the afternoon while clicking on the main city transporter, choosing what area he wanted to fly to.

Who knew that after a few seconds, the game scene was still motionless.

The transporter had refused his transport request.

Jing Huan was stupefied for a moment and carefully looked at the system prompt that had popped up, trying to understand the meaning of NPC‘s dialogue.

A few seconds later, his eyes widened, and he grabbed the phone in a hurry.

–

In class, Xiang Huaizhi’s eyes were droopy, his fingers were randomly twirling a pen around, and his long legs were loosely slack against the ground. His whole person looked absent-minded.

“Did you come to class to listen or just to see me?” Xiang Huaizhi had reached the end of his forbearance and asked the person next to him.

Lu Hang had been caught but didn’t care at all. He said, “I just wanted to ask you…”

“Don’t ask.”

“The female junior… Will your girlfriend be waiting for you after class? Or, are you two going to eat together later? Bring me too?”

Xiang Huaizhi ignored him, but Lu Hang’s words brought forth several ideas in his mind.

Why not ask the small underclassman out for lunch?

His afternoon class would start at 1:30 pm, so it wasn’t like he didn’t have time.

He reached into his pocket, hesitating, but then his cellphone buzzed twice.

Xiang Huaizhi took out his cellphone and looked down.

Someone in the guild’s WeChat group had @him and sent some fresh screenshots of a chat record, which was full of Xiao Tianjing’s heroic words.

Like before, the other person’s name had been blurred out, leaving only Xiao Tianjiang’s words.

Xiang Huaizhi gave it a cursory glance. “….”

Why was this person still so fond of putting on an act?

Due to not wanting to get up in the morning, his mouth had been tightly pursed into a line all morning, but now, there was finally a little sign of it relaxing.

Xiang Huaizhi moved his finger, saved the picture, and then @ the guild member who had sent him the picture.

Yearning For: Tell the person with the blurred name in the screenshot to not leave the safe area for this period of time.

After this sentence, he opened Jing Huan’s chat box and sent the picture to him.

Xiang: [Picture] [Picture]

Xiang: How resolute are you?

As he said this, a message also came from the opposite side——

Xiao Jing ya: [picture]

Xiao Jing ya: I fucking gave birth prematurely!!!

[Xiao Jing ya has withdrawn a message]

Xiao Jing ya: The child came out earlier than expected.

Lu Hang was holding his cellphone and was looking through the chat logs in the guild group.

“Fuck me!” He was in a panic. “I really didn’t notice that I hadn’t turned off the mic yesterday… Fuck, who recorded it ah? So evil?? Crap, I really didn’t mean to. I’ll find out later…”

He turned his head to explain, but saw Xiang Huaizhi close his textbooks silently and pile them together.

Lu Hang was stunned. “No way, you don’t want to beat me up, do you? Listen to me…”

Before he could finish speaking, Lu Hang felt like a cold breeze had blown past him.

His bosom roommate picked up his textbooks and left the classroom without looking back.

—

Juurensha: Huanhuan, just having fun at Immortal Mengmeng’s expense. And yay, the kid is here!

Divi: Lu Hang: …. You should’ve just asked him directly about the cheating on XTJ LOL. Immortal Mengmeng though, what’s wrong with you!!! *slaps*

And lovely fanart of the umbrella kiss by Xapheryn:

And we have a fanart page!

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