He's My Fiancée ! : I Went Back To The Past and You !

Chapter 174: Story of Pain-I

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Xiao Yun sat on the edge of the couch gingerly, peeking to the side and saw him staring at her while propelling his head with his arm. "Come nearer." he cooed. 

Xiao Yun inched a little slow to decrease the distance between them, but she was still a little far away from him. Seeing the girl was shy, he decided to close the distance by himself, pulling her hand to bring her to his laps and embraced her. Xiao Yun stepped back and felt his hand wrapping on her waist. "Why are you running away from me?" he reflected to his behavior, a little nervous that she was afraid of his anger affected her.

"I'm- I'm not running away from you. I've reflected on my mistakes." She murmured, she turned to a tomato when she understood she was sitting on his laps. The warmth under her tights made her brain stopped working.

"Are you still angry?" she fiddled with her hand and evade his eyes. "I'm sorry, but I was sure I will not fall at that time, Really! I was sure that I could evade her attack!" she persuaded.

"From now on, you should consult and discuss with me before doing anything. No matter how small it is you have to tell me don't keep anything hidden from me." He spoke, his eyes softened from the girl's gaze when he knew she didn't fear him in the least. 

"Okay!" Xiao Yun vigorously nodded, she took his little finger and link it with hers. "I promise."

He softly stared at her little finger and continued, "Always bring Tian Yi and Hi Gu Yan with you." 

"Okay." 

"And don't  get close to those two boys anymore."

"Okay! Eh?-" Xiao Yun agreed before Wang Li Lei finished. "Li Lei, are you still jealous? You don't need to worry, in my eyes, there is no one far more handsome than you!" she giggled. 

A blossoming feeling budded in his heart and a chuckled faintly escaped from his lips. He brought her face closer to him and wrapped his hand on her waist for him to lean his head on her back. The warmth that she had spread made his heart to calm down. "I always wonder how could I protect you from anyone. From anything that could endanger you."

Xiao Yun had never created troubles, but troubles always love to linger around her and the fact worried him. The only way to protect her would be locking her some way far from other's touch, but her smile would disappear if he does that and it was the last thing that he would want. 

"Put your trust in me, I don't get hurt often." She replied brightly without knowing what he was thinking. In an instance, the dark thoughts that began to collude him disappeared from her light.

"Mn." He replied. 

Remembering something Xiao Yun looked up at his face. "Li Lei, I've asked you how did you know that Hydrangea flowers are my favorites, right?"

"Mn." Wang Li Lei confirmed, busying his hand and eyes on the girl. 

"I remembered now, we have met since long before when we were children!" 

Xiao Yun's word brought nostalgia to his eyes. Softly he pulled his lips. "You remembered?" 

"Yes." Xiao Yun nodded and began to tell their treasured memory. "We met under the tree in Wang Family's house. That time I fell from the tree and nearly shocked you to death." She laughed, remembering little Li Lei's shocked eyes after seeing a girl falling down out of nowhere.

"You did. At that time, I thought you were an angel from that fell from the sky." He continued. Since their first meeting, Wang Li Lei had fallen for her. The girl didn't know, but when he thought that the girl fell from Heaven, he thought of possible ways that could stop the people above to take her back. 

Xiao Yun's face blushed. "Angel? I'm not that pretty." she denied but her smile couldn't stop. 

Wang Li Lei was serious with his words. Even at the time when he was still a powerless child, Xiao Yun was the very living of the word beautiful to him. "Yes, perhaps you are not an angel but that's great. If you were one, I wouldn't know what to do to take you down from heaven. With wings on your back, I'm afraid I will have to trim your wings." he whispered out his feelings. 

"You don't have to I will definitely come to you.  The handkerchief that you have, is it mine?"

He nodded. "Yes. It was the only thing that saves me when I was alone." his words were filled with a sense of solitude and loneliness. Xiao Yun could feel her heart clenched from the feelings depicted in his eyes. She turned her head to touch his cheek, wondering how could he withstand the pain that came with loneliness alone. There must have been people around him but he still felt alone by himself, thinking that he's in a wide sea of darkness. 

"I'm here now." She swore an oath. 

He touched her palm back and closed his eyes. "And I'm here too."

"About yesterday. I haven't finished telling you the story. It would be long and it may sound unbelievable but it's the truth." Xiao  Yun brought up the past that she tried to hide in her heart. Every time she breathed out she could feel pain prickling her heart but with the hand over her palm, her heart soothed by the warmth.

"I believe you." He reassured her. 

"I have died." Xiao Yun began and felt the grip upon her hand tightened but he didn't say anything, waiting for her to continue. "This is my second life, I have died and that is the future that supposed to happen after another 5 years. I married you for four years but our marriage wasn't the best. I was egoistic in the past and very unstable with my feelings. We would often fight, but it was a one-sided fight. I would be the person who shouted and threw everything while you always keep quite on your own, bearing with the anger that I forcefully push to you.

One day, after we had a horrible fight, I forced you on signing a divorce, and that day I came to my crush's house only to find him marrying Qu Mei Xing. I was devastated, my heartfelt painful but it wasn't because I know that he married Mei Xing, it was because I let you go and made you feel horrible. 

Xing Fu Ge- Ge's friend held a marriage party in Korea and he told me to go there to relax after crying and drowning in futile sadness every day. I also think that I need a break from everything and pull myself together and agreed to travel to Korea. But I didn't know that it was the worst choice that I could have ever made." 

She drew in a mouthful of breath and let out an unstable voice that trembled her hands. "After my arrival in Korea, I met a man named Choi Yeon Jun."

Wang Li Lei's sharp eyes narrowed to her words. He did say nothing and bear with the painful story that she told, but the raging sea had surpassed its border when she called out Choi Yeon Jun's name. It was a wave of immeasurable anger that he never felt before, mixed with hatred and detest. 

Xiao Yun continued again. "Choi Yeon Jun was a man that always reminded me of you. In our first meeting, he needed an urgent drive as his closest subordinate was in a hospital. He asked me whether he could come in the same taxi as me. After seeing how shaken he was, I agreed and come with him to the hospital because he was very unstable at that time. 

When he finished his visited to the hospital, he wanted to repay the favor and said that he would want to show him the best places in Korea. I declined but he brightly persuaded me and after that day, we have gotten a little closer as a friend. 

I thought I could be a little happier after all the time passed, but my heart couldn't stop blaming myself for leaving you. When I realized I love you, everything was too late. However, since that day, my memory became blurred. I would often be attacked by memories that I have no recollection for, until one day I fainted from the painful throbbing in my head. 

When Xing Fu Ge-Ge came, he said that the doctor asked me whether I have been in an accident but we were sure that I have never been in an accident and denied the doctor's question. Those memories were from the day when I confessed my love to you, our marriage and things that I believe I have never done before. Every memory was the one that I had with you. 

I was confused by my own memories and kept on having unending nightmares. Until one day, on the day of the marriage party, I met you again and realized that I have lost almost three years of my own memories. I confessed to you again and we reconciled, but that wasn't the end of everything. 

The next day, my parents-" Xiao Yun pursed her lips and gulped. "-they died in a car accident when they have just arrived at Korea, and Xing Fu Ge-Ge was caught because he used drugs. Of course, he didn't use the drug, but in Korea, I couldn't speak or understand their language. I could only cry, cry for my parent's loss and cry for Xing Fu Ge-Ge's imprisonment." 

She was a coward in the past and she hated herself to the core for her powerless self. One would say it's easy to forget the past and wound could be healed by times but even when the wounds are healed scars still remain and for that scar to disappear it would take more time. Yet Xiao Yun bites down to her own wound as soon as she was rebirthed, with only a single thing in her mind. That was to protect her beloved and her family so the past would never repeat ever again. Xiao Yun tapped her heart that thudded in fear and tears began to form in her eyes. She wiped it fast and felt Wang Li Lei calming her frightened self with the gentle touch of his hand. 

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