I Don’t Want To Be An Ojakgyo

"Hmm hmm~ I'm the pink! Prin! Cess! I'm the prettiest~."

Semi had been an energetic kid as soon as she was born. She couldn't seem to walk calmly on her way home, and she continued to hop back, only stepping on the red stones on the ground. Semi stretched her arms out as she hummed, then began singing the song out loud.

She was singing the theme song of the children's animation series that we had watched together before I had died. It seemed like seeing Swan reminded her of the show, because that was what she was singing.

Semi, who had been jumping along as she sang, stopped singing when she got to the chorus.

"Uh, what came after this part again? How did the next part go again, oppa?"

Semi stopped as she scratched her head, frowning.

"The flying, greedy sweet red bean soup!"

"That's not it! That's a different song!"

Semi, who had been hopping next to my side, got snarky at Yehwan, just like she always did. Yehwan just pouted as he looked towards Semi.

Watching all of this unfold, I felt a wash of nostalgia go over me as I opened my mouth. Then, the song just burst out of my mouth.

Even as I began to sing out loud, I was amazed by the fact that this was still in my head somewhere.

"Oh~ the shining pink light. Oh~ how bright and shiny~."

Semi was curious about the lyrics so I had sung along, but I was horrible at singing. Like, I genuinely couldn't sing.

Because of that, the pitch and rhythm were all a mess, but the lyrics were correct so she would be able to sing along. It was nice to hear Semi's upbeat singing after so long that I ended up singing along.

Even I could hear how horrible my voice was, so I scratched my cheek awkwardly through the shirt when I realized that Yehwan and Semi were both staring at me. They looked stunned as they looked at me.

Semi, especially, seemed to go through a wealth of emotions until her face began to twist. Her large eyes grew more and more red as tears began to well.

Yehwan looked at me with a wobbly smile.

"Unni…… What is this. Why are you so bad at singing too?"

Semi's voice was shaking as she began to tear up. One tear became two. Her small mouth wobbled and drooped. Semi began to cry so loudly that I worried for her throat. She was so loud that I worried that it would rip.

I didn't know what to do in the face of Semi's tears.

What should I do? Wouldn't she be surprised if I hugged her out of nowhere?

"You suck so much. You really, really suck. What is thaaaaaat………."

Yehwan hugged the sobbing Semi and patted her back as he chided about her bad manners before he bowed to me in apology.

"You're not that bad at singing. Semi's just like this because your singing is like our oldest sister. I was the same, but Semi really loved and followed after our sister."

Semi buried her face into Yehwan's shoulder as she continued to cry.

"I want to see you, unni…….. Unni………….. I want to see you………"

Semi's nose began to drip even as she continued to sob. Her snot began to fall in droplets and fell onto Yehwan's shoulder, but Yehwan didn't seem to care much about it. I had also moved behind Swan and was hiding my face behind his shoulder. Nobody would be able to see my face because of the shirt, but I still wanted to hide behind something.

Yehwan apologized to me once again, but Semi's crying was so loud that he was cut off at every time. Yehwan was also crying.

"Se-yoo hyung said that you could see our nuna after 32,580 days."

"We learned about division in school. Thirty two thousand, five hundred and eighty days is 90 years, oppa. That's basically him telling us to meet her after we die! I hate all of you! Go away! Do you think I'm stupid or something?! Unni! Ye-an unnii!!! Unni!!"

Semi was inconsolable. Yehwan was hugging and holding Semi, but Semi shoved him away and tried to land on the ground but rolled onto the ground instead. I was so surprised that I unknowingly caught and set Semi down on the ground before she got hurt.

I wanted to hug Semi, who couldn't even move properly from how hard she was crying, and finally gathered enough courage to try.

I spread my arms towards Semi, who was crying. She tried to wipe away the tears with her tiny hands as she ran towards me into my hug.

I couldn't help but think of the past as I hugged Semi. After our parents passed, Semi had cried often. I had hugged her like this and had patted her between her butt and her waist to calm her down.

Semi was still small, so she was light as I hugged her. She had been clinging onto my neck when I raised her up and held her in my arms. She soon stopped crying.

Yehwan told Semi to come down as he stared at the snot on my shoulder, but Semi just breathed quietly and didn't attempt to move.

I told Yehwan that it was okay and smiled towards him as I combed his hair with my hand. Yehwan's expression turned blank.

Semi fiddled with her fingers behind my neck and tried to calm down. She soon grew quiet.

"Se-yoo oppa said that if I cried, unni would get sad and she wouldn't be happy no matter how far away she was. He said I shouldn't cry, but I cried again. I hadn't cried in months. Honest."

Semi mumbled, resting her chubby cheek on my shoulder.

"Shirt unni, this is an exception because you're really bad at singing. Our unni left after she worried about us her entire life. She can't be sad even when she's far away."

Semi muttered sadly. I couldn't say anything as I listened to Semi. An emotion that I couldn't seem to put into words seemed to rock within my body in waves.

I bit my lips and breathed in deeply as I took out the snail plush that I had been planning on giving to Semi.

I raised the snail plushie up so Semi could see, and shook it left and right.

Semi's eyes grew wide as the interest in the plush grew.

"It's a snail! I love snails! When I told unni to buy me a toy before, unni said to just play at home and catch bugs…. But I love snails!"

Semi was so excited that her words just seemed to explode out of her, but it was obvious that she really loved it. Even as she sniffled, her smile was bright as she shook her legs. When I handed Semi the plush, she gave me a wide simle.

Semi tugged on the snail's head as she laughed loudly. She was playing around and laughing, but her sadness hadn't completely faded away. But she kept smiling as much as she could towards me.

After calming down Semi with the plush, I wondered how I could hand Yehwan his gift for a moment. It would be incredibly weird for me to just hand him a fruit knife, after all.

But I realized that I didn't have the luxury to worry about things like that right now.

I took out the fruit knife from the pretty bag that I had and handed it to Yehwan. Yehwan was trying his best to console Semi as she cried and tilted his head in confusion at the random gift I was handing him. Yehwan asked why I was suddenly giving him that, but I couldn't respond.

There wasn't much time left. I glanced at Swan and then looked at Yehwan and asked him for something.

"Can you give this to your hyung?"

I handed him the necklace. There was a small orange and black magic stone pendant on the necklace. It was the first magic stone that I had ever made, and was something incredibly meaningful to me.

Yehwan received the necklace with my stone and stared intensely at me before sighing.

"Nuna said not to receive gifts from strangers, but whatever. This is some sort of contest prize, right? What kind of event is this?"

Yehwan tilted his head as he looked at me. When I couldn't say anything again, Yehwan began to pout.

I wondered how to respond to Yehwan's words before speaking up a bit late.

"There's also….a free hug event. Can I hug you just this once?"

Yehwan complained about how this event was all over the place but stopped right before we all arrived at home. Then, he rolled his eyes before nodding and stretched his short arms and gave me a tight hug. Semi, who had been clinging to me in my arms earlier, also ran back towards me and gave me a hug.

"I wish this unni would hug Se-yoo oppa like this too."

Semi and Yehwan didn't let me go once they hugged me. Tears were falling from their eyes. They seemed reluctant to let me go until Yehwan said, "Se-yoo hyung's really going to get a hemorrhoid at this rate." and they finally let go.

"Guys, it's been really fun. We'll be leaving now. Get home safe."

I let the two go right before we arrived in front of their home. The two of them kept looking back towards us and waved until they saw Se-yoo walking around the apartment building looking for them. They ran towards him.

"Hey! Did you guys go to the Amazon or something to make your own toilet rolls? Why are you so late?"

"Whoa, hyung. How did you get out so quickly? Gross……"

"Se-yoo oppa, you smell like poo……. No! It's meat! Oppa, did you eat meat without us?"

I remembered when I was a part of that group and couldn't help but smile bitterly. Se-yoo had gotten thinner in the time I hadn't seen him, and his eyes seemed to glint with more responsibility, probably because of his siblings. He was just as sly-looking as before though.

"I wasn't trying to eat all by myself. I cooked earlier to surprise you guys, you butts."

"Stop lying. You probably only left the fat."

"Se-yoo oppa is like that, after all."

I could feel that the somber air around them was slowly filling with the close bond that they had with each other. They were growing to be good, strong people.

I smiled as I watched them from afar. They were all moving forward and facing their pain.

I wanted to run to Se-yoo and give him a farewell greeting too, but I stopped myself and turned my head to look at Swan.

"Let's go back now."

"Why? We can stay longer. You didn't even greet that kid over there."

I stared at Swan, who was slowly getting more and more pale. His breaths were coming in pants.

"We should really go."

"Don't worry about me. We're already here, so do what you want to do."

Swanhaden rested his forehead on mind and gave me a smile. Seeing how his weight was shifting towards me, I could tell that he was growing weaker by the moment.

"Hmm hmm~ I'm the pink! Prin! Cess! I'm the prettiest~."

Semi had been an energetic kid as soon as she was born. She couldn't seem to walk calmly on her way home, and she continued to hop back, only stepping on the red stones on the ground. Semi stretched her arms out as she hummed, then began singing the song out loud.

She was singing the theme song of the children's animation series that we had watched together before I had died. It seemed like seeing Swan reminded her of the show, because that was what she was singing.

Semi, who had been jumping along as she sang, stopped singing when she got to the chorus.

"Uh, what came after this part again? How did the next part go again, oppa?"

Semi stopped as she scratched her head, frowning.

"The flying, greedy sweet red bean soup!""That's not it! That's a different song!"

Semi, who had been hopping next to my side, got snarky at Yehwan, just like she always did. Yehwan just pouted as he looked towards Semi.

Watching all of this unfold, I felt a wash of nostalgia go over me as I opened my mouth. Then, the song just burst out of my mouth.

Even as I began to sing out loud, I was amazed by the fact that this was still in my head somewhere.

"Oh~ the shining pink light. Oh~ how bright and shiny~."

Semi was curious about the lyrics so I had sung along, but I was horrible at singing. Like, I genuinely couldn't sing.

Because of that, the pitch and rhythm were all a mess, but the lyrics were correct so she would be able to sing along. It was nice to hear Semi's upbeat singing after so long that I ended up singing along.

Even I could hear how horrible my voice was, so I scratched my cheek awkwardly through the shirt when I realized that Yehwan and Semi were both staring at me. They looked stunned as they looked at me.

Semi, especially, seemed to go through a wealth of emotions until her face began to twist. Her large eyes grew more and more red as tears began to well.

Yehwan looked at me with a wobbly smile.

"Unni…… What is this. Why are you so bad at singing too?"

Semi's voice was shaking as she began to tear up. One tear became two. Her small mouth wobbled and drooped. Semi began to cry so loudly that I worried for her throat. She was so loud that I worried that it would rip.

I didn't know what to do in the face of Semi's tears.

What should I do? Wouldn't she be surprised if I hugged her out of nowhere?

"You suck so much. You really, really suck. What is thaaaaaat………."

Yehwan hugged the sobbing Semi and patted her back as he chided about her bad manners before he bowed to me in apology.

"You're not that bad at singing. Semi's just like this because your singing is like our oldest sister. I was the same, but Semi really loved and followed after our sister."

Semi buried her face into Yehwan's shoulder as she continued to cry.

"I want to see you, unni…….. Unni………….. I want to see you………"

Semi's nose began to drip even as she continued to sob. Her snot began to fall in droplets and fell onto Yehwan's shoulder, but Yehwan didn't seem to care much about it. I had also moved behind Swan and was hiding my face behind his shoulder. Nobody would be able to see my face because of the shirt, but I still wanted to hide behind something.

Yehwan apologized to me once again, but Semi's crying was so loud that he was cut off at every time. Yehwan was also crying.

"Se-yoo hyung said that you could see our nuna after 32,580 days.""We learned about division in school. Thirty two thousand, five hundred and eighty days is 90 years, oppa. That's basically him telling us to meet her after we die! I hate all of you! Go away! Do you think I'm stupid or something?! Unni! Ye-an unnii!!! Unni!!"

Semi was inconsolable. Yehwan was hugging and holding Semi, but Semi shoved him away and tried to land on the ground but rolled onto the ground instead. I was so surprised that I unknowingly caught and set Semi down on the ground before she got hurt.

I wanted to hug Semi, who couldn't even move properly from how hard she was crying, and finally gathered enough courage to try.

I spread my arms towards Semi, who was crying. She tried to wipe away the tears with her tiny hands as she ran towards me into my hug.

I couldn't help but think of the past as I hugged Semi. After our parents passed, Semi had cried often. I had hugged her like this and had patted her between her butt and her waist to calm her down.

Semi was still small, so she was light as I hugged her. She had been clinging onto my neck when I raised her up and held her in my arms. She soon stopped crying.

Yehwan told Semi to come down as he stared at the snot on my shoulder, but Semi just breathed quietly and didn't attempt to move.

I told Yehwan that it was okay and smiled towards him as I combed his hair with my hand. Yehwan's expression turned blank.

Semi fiddled with her fingers behind my neck and tried to calm down. She soon grew quiet.

"Se-yoo oppa said that if I cried, unni would get sad and she wouldn't be happy no matter how far away she was. He said I shouldn't cry, but I cried again. I hadn't cried in months. Honest."

Semi mumbled, resting her chubby cheek on my shoulder.

"Shirt unni, this is an exception because you're really bad at singing. Our unni left after she worried about us her entire life. She can't be sad even when she's far away."

Semi muttered sadly. I couldn't say anything as I listened to Semi. An emotion that I couldn't seem to put into words seemed to rock within my body in waves.

I bit my lips and breathed in deeply as I took out the snail plush that I had been planning on giving to Semi.

I raised the snail plushie up so Semi could see, and shook it left and right.

Semi's eyes grew wide as the interest in the plush grew.

"It's a snail! I love snails! When I told unni to buy me a toy before, unni said to just play at home and catch bugs…. But I love snails!"

Semi was so excited that her words just seemed to explode out of her, but it was obvious that she really loved it. Even as she sniffled, her smile was bright as she shook her legs. When I handed Semi the plush, she gave me a wide simle.

Semi tugged on the snail's head as she laughed loudly. She was playing around and laughing, but her sadness hadn't completely faded away. But she kept smiling as much as she could towards me.

After calming down Semi with the plush, I wondered how I could hand Yehwan his gift for a moment. It would be incredibly weird for me to just hand him a fruit knife, after all.

But I realized that I didn't have the luxury to worry about things like that right now.

I took out the fruit knife from the pretty bag that I had and handed it to Yehwan. Yehwan was trying his best to console Semi as she cried and tilted his head in confusion at the random gift I was handing him. Yehwan asked why I was suddenly giving him that, but I couldn't respond.

There wasn't much time left. I glanced at Swan and then looked at Yehwan and asked him for something.

"Can you give this to your hyung?"

I handed him the necklace. There was a small orange and black magic stone pendant on the necklace. It was the first magic stone that I had ever made, and was something incredibly meaningful to me.

Yehwan received the necklace with my stone and stared intensely at me before sighing.

"Nuna said not to receive gifts from strangers, but whatever. This is some sort of contest prize, right? What kind of event is this?"

Yehwan tilted his head as he looked at me. When I couldn't say anything again, Yehwan began to pout.

I wondered how to respond to Yehwan's words before speaking up a bit late.

"There's also….a free hug event. Can I hug you just this once?"

Yehwan complained about how this event was all over the place but stopped right before we all arrived at home. Then, he rolled his eyes before nodding and stretched his short arms and gave me a tight hug. Semi, who had been clinging to me in my arms earlier, also ran back towards me and gave me a hug.

"I wish this unni would hug Se-yoo oppa like this too."

Semi and Yehwan didn't let me go once they hugged me. Tears were falling from their eyes. They seemed reluctant to let me go until Yehwan said, "Se-yoo hyung's really going to get a hemorrhoid at this rate." and they finally let go.

"Guys, it's been really fun. We'll be leaving now. Get home safe."

I let the two go right before we arrived in front of their home. The two of them kept looking back towards us and waved until they saw Se-yoo walking around the apartment building looking for them. They ran towards him.

"Hey! Did you guys go to the Amazon or something to make your own toilet rolls? Why are you so late?"

"Whoa, hyung. How did you get out so quickly? Gross……"

I remembered when I was a part of that group and couldn't help but smile bitterly. Se-yoo had gotten thinner in the time I hadn't seen him, and his eyes seemed to glint with more responsibility, probably because of his siblings. He was just as sly-looking as before though.

"I wasn't trying to eat all by myself. I cooked earlier to surprise you guys, you butts."

"Stop lying. You probably only left the fat."

I could feel that the somber air around them was slowly filling with the close bond that they had with each other. They were growing to be good, strong people.

I smiled as I watched them from afar. They were all moving forward and facing their pain.

I wanted to run to Se-yoo and give him a farewell greeting too, but I stopped myself and turned my head to look at Swan.

"Let's go back now.""Why? We can stay longer. You didn't even greet that kid over there."

I stared at Swan, who was slowly getting more and more pale. His breaths were coming in pants.

"We should really go.""Don't worry about me. We're already here, so do what you want to do."

Swanhaden rested his forehead on mind and gave me a smile. Seeing how his weight was shifting towards me, I could tell that he was growing weaker by the moment.

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