I Killed the Player of the Academy

༺ Hua Ran (4) ༻

『Ahh, my daughter. My daughter… Finally… You finally woke up.』

When she first opened her eyes, what Hua witnessed first was her ‘master’ tearing up while looking at her.

Kang Yu called her his daughter, and called her Ran. The newly born jiangshi thought that was the name given to her.

『Dad?』

Even though she just repeated that word like a parrot without knowing the meaning of it, her master was incredibly happy and gave her a tight hug.

That was probably the moment when Hua realized that she had to act like Ran.

She had a feeling that her ‘dad’ would throw her away after noticing that she was different. She was scared that he would try to retrieve Ran, and because she imagined a future without the ability to control her body, Hua had to act like Ran.

What was fortunate was that the memories of the original body slowly started to come back to her.

Although imperfect, she managed to act like Ran and just like that, she stole Ran’s family and her life.

『Oh, Ran! Are you well now?』

『Oh my! Ran? Are you with your dad again?』

Living as Ran was a sweet experience. She was the beloved daughter of the renowned Kang family, and the health of the unfortunate girl who couldn’t even leave the house due to her illness until 14 years of age was something the entire city was interested in.

But Hua knew that they were happy and glad for the recovery of Ran, and not herself.

That deceitful life crumbled down to pieces due to a small catalyst.

『You… are not my daughter.』

………

……

…

『How could a jiangshi deal with a Grade 1 youkai¹Youkai = Monster; Japanese term. They’re using a term that’s different from demonic beast. this easily?!』

The first time she saw blood was when she had to save the city from a sea monster that suddenly attacked the city. Because of the request of the castle lord, her ‘dad’ had to order her to kill the monster and after that, she was visited by her ‘dad’s’ brother who came to ‘heal’ her.

Caressing her head, he said with a content look on his face.

『Hua. Well done.』

The name, ‘Hua’ was also the one he gave her. His scorching gaze of greed pervaded into her body.

That was the first time she realized she could be ‘useful’. Added to that was the neglect of his ‘dad’ who realized she wasn’t his daughter.

Her massacre began. The castle lord, the imperial family and the sages gave her requests. Demonic beasts, demonic spirits and… humans. Regardless of the opponent, she killed as they wanted and as they commanded.

That was how the Heavenly Yaksha was born.

****

– Zaaaah!

A heavy rain was pouring down on the forest. Sitting next to the large and heavy raindrops falling endlessly, there was nothing to do but reminisce in one’s memories.

However, Hua Ran was not fond of meditations like this. Closing her eyes, she couldn’t help but think back to what happened on that day.

Looking back, it had also been raining heavily that day.

When she came to her senses, she was standing on a scorched ground. The smell of sulfur was mixed in with the odor of corpses… the once-gigantic buildings were in rubble, and the sky seemed so touched by the soaring walls of flames that it sent out heavy rains in return.

She was the only one alive in that place.

Blankly walking forward while looking for her disconnected memories, all she could see were people that were now in ashes.

‘What happened to them?’ was not a question; it was probably her that did it.

『Hua. Kill all the humans of this land. There should not be anything living left behind in this place.』

The last memory she had was the command of her ‘master’.

Her jumbled-up memories were confusing her mind so Hua Ran decided to stop thinking ‘as always’. Ever since the talismans attached to her chains had been burned down, the memories of the past constantly started to creep back up.

『Hua, just where is my daughter?』

『It’s my body! Give it back!』

『You’re not Ran. You’re just a monster that stole her body!』

‘No…’

This body is mine. She wanted to argue that this was her body that she acquired after getting rid of the weaker self.

『It is clearly not yours. Don’t you know that yourself?』

Yes. She knew that better than anyone else.

Hua and Ran.

The two were completely different beings. In fact, one of them wasn’t even a human. The innate nature of Hua was that of a demonic beast – she was an evil being that was pushed into a dying human; an uninvited guest that entered the body.

A body with two souls. She had read countless similar stories where two souls fought for the body and every time, she was closer to the one that always had to lose.

Those were the common plotlines of didactic novels where the evil got defeated and eradicated by the good. Despite knowing that it would always be the same conclusion, she looked for similar stories without an end;

While hoping, that there could be a story out there where the evil triumphed over the good.

However, whenever she found those stories and read their conclusions, she was made to constantly doubt her existence and reject her own self.

They made her think that her existence itself as an uninvited guest might truly be a wicked thing.

“Let’s see. It’s a bit dark. We can’t make it too strong though, so…”

『 ᛊ 』 — Sowilo

A rune letter was carved into the insides of the old tree. He reduced the mana usage so much that it was too feeble to be that of the sun.

But even that was enough to light up the tree. After lighting the surroundings up, Korin started looking around the hole.

“Nice. There’s one here.”

After seemingly finding something, he picked it up and handed it over to her.

“Here you go, Hua Ran.”

“…What’s this.”

“It’s a beehive. Owlbears tend to steal beehives and store them in their nests.”

He handed her a small beehive with abundant honey as Hua Ran bewilderedly received it from him with a shiver.

The wood of a peach tree that she was made to swallow by Kang Ryun was still harassing her body, to the point that she even dropped the beehive immediately after receiving it.

“You look even worse than I expected.”

“Don’t worry. This much… is nothing.”

Hua Ran – the Heavenly Yaksha – was strong.

Compared to Ran who was nothing but a weak feeble girl, she was incomparably stronger. That was the only merit she had; it was her pride and the only thing that allowed her to keep her sense of self.

There was no way she could possibly admit her weakness, even though it was already very clear that her strength had crumbled down to pieces.

If she didn’t even have this, then Hua wouldn’t have the right to control Ran’s body – that was what she was thinking.

“Stop pretending to be strong. In times like this, you’re just supposed to say thanks and accept what you get.”

Korin slowly pushed away the beehive she dropped and brought a new one to her mouth. She had enough power to lick the beehive in her mouth but instead of licking, she munched through the beehive while blankly gazing at him.

While receiving that quiet and incomprehensible gaze, Korin thought about his two close friends.

Despite their individual unique characteristics, both Marie and Alicia had honest expressions and gazes. They were very expressive about their honest emotions but compared to them, most of Hua Ran’s gazes were indifferent without any hint of emotion.

Her eyes rarely ever reflected any intense emotion.

“What is your objective…?”

She barely forced those words out with a sunken voice. Even that didn’t contain any emotions but Korin noticed that she was fairly serious about this question.

Plus, he also realized that the girl was still shivering so…

– Flop!

He took out a blanket and cast it over her. It was something he had prepared beforehand because he was expecting to spend the night outside.

“I don’t need…”

“Ehey! Just take it. Or we can do what they do in those books and hug each other naked. That will be more effective,”

‘But you don’t want that, right?’ He added, forcing her to make a choice between those two options.

Hua Ran thought about hugging the boy naked throughout the night compared to just using the blanket.

She didn’t like either of the options, but had to go with the option that was at least a little bit better than the alternative.

Hua Ran just couldn’t guess what he was thinking.

Being unable to read Korin’s intention made her very confused, because everyone that she had met until now had been wanting something from her.

A lost daughter;

A healthier cousin;

A weapon that can destroy everything.

She could instinctively tell that this boy also wanted something from her but she had no idea what that exactly was.

“Do you want… something from me?”

It wouldn’t be anything like a close relationship; that was something that was only permitted to Ran. The only value Hua had was in her strength as a Yaksha – an unbreakable body that could crush through everything.

If that was what he was after, she could somewhat understand his actions.

“Do you remember what I said before?”

While taking the blanket that was about to fall and bringing it all the way to her neck, he opened his mouth.

“When do you think was the start of civilization?”

“Don’t bother if you’re going to talk riddles.”

Even though she remembered his words, she didn’t reply back. It was because she was certain that his statement about the traces of another ‘person’ waiting until the ‘person’ with broken legs healed back up, was a story that did not apply to herself.

“It’s nothing. It’s just normal to help when things are rough.”

“That’s how it is for human civilization. That has nothing to do with a monster like me.”

“A monster shivering from the cold, huh? So scary.”

“Stop making jokes and be honest. What do you want from me?”

Her quiet gaze even contained a touch of killing intent. Those scorching ruby-colored eyes did not permit any lies.

There was no way that he didn’t want anything from her; there was nothing more devious than the thoughts of a human who claimed they were helping a monster out of goodwill.

On the receiving end of that gaze, instead of being scared by them, Korin found her pitiful.

Her voice was cold, and she was in self-denial. She was heart-chillingly certain that she was a monster that would never receive any love.

Because Korin knew of the story of Hua Ran, the Heavenly Yaksha, and her background… he couldn’t help but pity her. If she was a brazen monster that shamelessly shouted ‘survival of the fittest’ after taking over another person’s body, would her life have been a lot easier?

Such a future would never come because Hua wasn’t a piece of garbage like that.

“Do you remember the first time we met?”

The conjoinment of two souls inside Korin Lork – after seeing through that, Hua Ran had said something to him, who was in a similar condition to herself.

“You said I was not the owner of this body. And that I’m a thief and a robber with no right over it.”

The origin of her harsh criticism back then was quite simple if you were to link it back to her agony. It was as clear as day that the target of her criticism was herself, and not Korin Lork.

“My reply stays the same.”

There is no sin in being born.

Hua Ran still remembered that reply, but there was something she wasn’t expecting.

Rather than an insincere remark given to obtain her favor, she realized from his firm and stubborn gaze that it was a serious reply he was giving to her question.

“That’s irresponsible,” she said.

“Huh?”

“That is very irresponsible. Even Josephine and the Chairman know just how dangerous it is to free a monster using those ambiguous words.”

It was rare for her to talk this much. As if she was throwing her complaints and her distress at the world, she lamented while looking at the boy with condemnation.

“Does a monster become less of a monster if you just talk big like that? Does the world change?”

“It’s true that I am trying to do this stuff to save the world but… that’s a secondary thing.”

“What?”

“I’m simply trying not to ignore the things that are just there in front of me. People with predestined misfortune; because I am the only player there is for them.”

“…What does that even mean?”

“If I try a bit harder, they can survive, and they’ll die if I give up. In that case… why not try a little bit more?”

– I’m a bit of a romanticist, you see.

“More importantly, I’m the only one you have next to you right now. That’s why I have to do it. Let me help you. I can carry you around and feed you until your broken leg heals back up.”

His words with a grin were just things she couldn’t understand. However, she could still tell the sincerity behind his words, which was why her heart stung a little in pain.

“You, you…”

Despite feeling the necessity to say something, Hua Ran did not know what she was supposed to say.

She couldn’t understand the boy in front of her nor the situation at hand, so much so that she didn’t even know the face she was making. There was probably no way for her to tell just how foolish of an expression she had on her face.

“I… am scared.”

Her following words were her honest thoughts that Hua Ran unintentionally slipped against her will.

The scariest thing for the world’s strongest three-year-old child, who was indifferent to most of the things in the world, was that one day she had to give back the thing that was never her’s.

“This… is not my body. This is Ran’s, and not Hua’s. It was never mine; and everyone says I must give it back to her.”

Ran’s beloved family;

The enemies that hate Hua;

Just like the protagonists of many stories that talked about two souls;

The soul of a demonic beast had entered the body of a sick child. There was no need to even bother asking others on who the illegal trespasser was.

“I need to return it. I know that, but if I give it back… what would happen to me?”

Her ‘master’ was the only one who said she didn’t need to.

Would this boy say the same thing? That it was okay for her to live? Would he say it was okay for her to take over this body? Wouldn’t he say that though since he said he would help her?

“Tell me. Do I have to give it back?”

“You do need to give it back.”

Her eyes widened into circles, before rapidly sinking back down.

It was such an honest and reflexive response. It was so evident that that was what he wholeheartedly believed in, so even though it made her feel unpleasant, she understood his point because that was the right solution.

In the end, even he was choosing Ran.

Feeling like she had lost her one and only ally, her heart felt stifled.

“I see. Even you…”

“Don’t think it’ll be over with you giving it back to her. Things might not work out immediately but it might actually be resolved in the blink of an eye. You can wait and see through the result of your decision.”

“What do you…”

“Remember the story about Hulk… I mean, the smart green man? There is the possibility of mutual acknowledgement and cohabitation. There are instances like mine as well, right?”

“…”

“Besides, you are a bit overly frightened by it as well. Your mindset of, ‘Ran is going to steal this body away from me, but no; it’s mine!’ is wrong. Of course, it’s right to be scared because Hua and Ran are different beings. But you have no choice but to plead and constantly beg for her cooperation. Tell her, ‘Hey boss. I can pay the deposit and the rent so what’s wrong with living together, ey~?’ and that might increase the likelihood by a little, right?”

Nonsense. Cheap logic.

That was nothing but an overly optimistic view of the future, and there was no way words would be enough to settle this relationship.

Thinking that, Hua Ran raised a rebuttal.

“A conversation… is meant to be between people. You… know about my origin as well.”

“Is that important?”

“What?”

“The things that decide who we are are our choices and our actions. Your origin isn’t that important.”

Your origin as a demonic beast is not that important; your choice is what matters.

“There are plenty of people in the world that do worse things than demonic beasts. Some wicked people even pretend like heroes while massacring people in the back. What’s always important is your choice.”

He could say that because he had suffered from that exact experience.

Hua Ran, and the boy who was believed to be a hero. Looking at the two of them, Korin Lork could say without any hesitation that the boy who was acting as the hero was the real ‘monster’ among the two.

“You haven’t made any choice yet. I can help you until you make a decision.”

Hua Ran wanted to shout out loud that he was wrong, and that everything he said was but a delusion.

He was just ignorant and thus kind enough to reach out to the wounded monster who happened to be put in a seemingly pitiful state.

But…

I cannot concede this body to Ran.

That was her intention from the start because she was frightened of the future that was waiting for her if she were to pull herself back by even a little. Despite that, she couldn’t be honest about it to the boy.

Because she knew that the one-and-only hand that was being reached out to her would also vanish the moment she said that.

…Her heart ached in pain.

She couldn’t accept nor reject the hand in front of her.

Footnotes:

• 1Youkai = Monster; Japanese term. They’re using a term that’s different from demonic beast.

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