Chapter 65 - Wife Talk
As it turned out, Rino had to admit he was a huge culinary failure. Noir coughed up the first mouthful of mashed potatoes he ate. It was difficult to stomach the taste of bland and earthy potatoes.
"We're never doing this again," Noir swore with his tail raised high and bristled.
Rino could only hang his head low and admit defeat. With nobody willing to eat this failed attempt of cooking mashed potatoes, Rino could only bury the evidence of his failure in the soil in his backyard. Nobody would find out he tried to cook today.
Putting that horrible creation behind them, Rino decided to check on the two new quests he received.
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Daily Quest #9
Objective: Harvest Potatoes
0/500 Potatoes
Time Limit: 2 Days.
Tutorial here.
Reward: Offering Reward Shop.
Penalty: Deduct 24 hours of sleep upon failure and [Curse of Overtime] until quest is forcefully completed.
===
After looking at the requirements and rejoicing that this was finally not a chain quest, Rino decided that there was no need to start harvesting immediately. He had enough hands to help with that, and Rino had a feeling they could fully dig up all the potatoes, clear the land and recondition the soil for a new batch of potatoes within a night.
This much, he already expected. Fronzo explained that they would have close to ten thousand potatoes in this one acre of field, so five hundred wasn't much. If there was an immediate problem, Rino needed to think of a place to store these potatoes. The current potato hut by his bathhouse was too small for ten thousand potatoes. The gnomes were also too busy with the sprinkler project to build his granary.
With drooping shoulders, Rino checked his side quest out. He had no idea if the side quest would allow him to use the Offering Reward Shop, but Rino hoped it was somewhat related. He did not want to start a new building project when his current agricultural infrastructure was still incomplete.
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Side Quest #12
Objective: Make an offering to the Offering Reward Shop
Reward: 8 hours of sleep.
===
Seeing that the side quest was linked to the completion of his main quest, Rino relaxed. The Gods were still reasonable bosses, so he decided to put up with them for a little while.
The Curse of Overtime sounded terrible. Rino did not have a good reason to want to boycott either. Harvesting potatoes in two days was easy, and he did not have to do anything himself. Everything could be left in the hands of his slave army.
"Wipe that look off your face," Noir snapped. "You look positively evil."
Rino clapped his skull with his hands and apologised. He was just enjoying the moment a little too much, knowing that the next quest was simple.
Without the shadow summons or faes around, Rino had nothing much to do. He did not want to spend his rewards sleeping now that Noir was here, but the black cat did not look like he was interested in anything else apart from snoozing comfortably by the fire.
How odd! Weren't cats nocturnal hunters?
"I'm bored," Rino whined to Noir while poking his tail playfully.
Noir flicked his tail gently while his eyes were still closed. It was simply too comfortable now to stay awake even if he had something important to tell Rino. It concerned the next phase of this massive kingdom-building project.
"Go find a wife," he told the lich.
Shocked, Rino sat up abruptly. "Why? Do you not like me anymore? Isn't life with just me fine? Why do you want me to find a wife? Is it because I'm a terrible cook?"
Noir was very tempted to say yes, but he held his tongue. Stephanie would kill him if Rino refused to assist with procreation. Even if he was undead, there were still ways around it. They simply had to increase the small world's population to farm more prayers through education.
"That's not it," Noir opened one eye and looked at the devastated lich who was on his hands and knees.
Honestly, how could a future monarch behave in such a manner? If Rino's subordinates saw this, they might skin him alive for bullying their monarch.
"I'm just thinking of your future," the black cat said. "It's only natural for every king to have offspring."
Rino deadpanned and looked at his hollow pelvic bones. "I'm undead. I live forever if I'm not killed. Besides, I don't have the right equipment to spawn brats. I would also rather not introduce a human to this kingdom because of the promise I made with the faes."
Even without Rino explaining his situation, Ace understood. He saw how Rino bought over the faes with his promise to create a kingdom without humans. Even if he brought in a human, it would be impossible to make babies with her.
"I'm not talking about a human wife. This forest is full of magical beasts and creatures. Surely, there will be one who could bear our children. Have you never wondered how magical creatures reproduce?"
Rino shuddered at that. "No. I don't think I want to know either. Building a family has never been my dream. I would rather remain alone forever, tinkering with new inventions and discovering new concepts."
Troubled, Noir asked if there was no way Rino could reconsider.
Sensing that there was more to just finding a wife, Rino asked if something was troubling Noir. It wasn't like the cat to be so insistent on something.
The black cat did not answer immediately. If he failed to convince Rino or find an alternative solution, Stephanie would smite him. He wouldn't die from that, but it would be very painful for a God. If mortals were to compare it, that would be the act of willingly opening his legs and accepting a kick in the nether regions for a man.
"Population. This world requires a legend to sustain its existence. You were born to be a king to revive this dying world. It's a prophecy that you were made to fulfil."
Hearing that there was a deeper reason for his rebirth, Rino stared at Noir. Just who was this cat? Why did he know so many things that even Rino did not?
"Are you sure you're just an ordinary cat who knows magic?"
Noir's eyes twinkled. "What do you think? Now that you know the reason, what will you do?"
Rino thought about it. No matter what, he wasn't willing to start a family. He enjoyed his solitude too much to be concerned with domestic bliss. However, he could now understand why Noir brought the topic up.
"If it was just to increase the world's population, I'm sure you can leave that to the humans."
The black cat sighed and rested its head on its paws. "Humans are too weak to survive in this harsh world. They are killed faster than they could reproduce."
Even without explanation, Rino caught the gist of it. Everywhere that he went, humans were always waging wars and fighting. It was not surprising that they were close to extinction after falling out with each other and making too many enemies.
"Weapons. Food. Knowledge. I can provide these for humans to help themselves. After that, the fate of this world rests entirely on them."
Indeed, this was the conclusion Ace thought they would arrive at. It was why he suggested introducing an offering reward shop as part of the system's updates for the lich.
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