My (Monster?) Hero Life

Chapter 3: I Ate What Now?!

Kace awoke to an unfamiliar rocky ceiling looming overhead. Grunting, he rolled over. Soon realising that he had been covered with a fur blanket on a rough makeshift bed. 'Ugh, what the hell happened?'

He fumbled around until he felt bony, leathery skin. 'Oh please God no!'. Peeking under the cover his eyes widened in horror as there lay the ugly, little witch of a goblin from before he passed out. Luckily enough though, after panicking for a while, he realised that she was still wearing her hide wrappings.

Gratitude for whatever God prevented him from being taken advantage of well up in his heart. 'I swear, that if I can ever repay you, I will!' he thought as he wiped the cold sweat from his brow.

That had been far too dangerous on so many different levels. A bundle of rough fur and hide clothes laying by the bed caught his attention. 'I wonder if those are meant for me?'

Very delicately he climbed over the sleeping goblin. Afraid that he would wake her. He examined the clothes as he picked them up. They certainly seemed the right size. The shirt was made of furs and leather lace, with an overhanging hide hood attached to it. The pants, boots and gloves were all made of hides and leather. A slight fur trim edged the boots.

They were a perfect fit. To perfect in fact. Especially around the crotch, he realised as another wave of sweat burst forth. That little gremlin in the bed had probably copped a feel!

He sighed heavily at his misfortune. 'Hmm, shouldn't I have earned something from that fight? Status!'

Glancing through the menu he realised that nothing at all had changed. 'God damn it you shitty, cheapskate system! First my innocence and then not even so much as thank you!' At this point he could have sworn he heard the mechanical laughter of Eve. 'I will get you for this one day!'

"Oh, you're finally awake," the hoarse yet suggestively seductive tone rang out, "I thought you'd never come out of it."

Kace turned around to face the ugly little thing as she dangled her legs from the bed. Believing that this could entice him. However, all it achieved was a vile taste in his mouth as he quickly swallowed the bile that leapt into his mouth.

"Ugh, yeah. H-how long was I out?"

"Tsk, not even asking a girl her name first? Guess you must be used to waking up next random beautiful girls."

Kace felt his face flush instantly. He did not know whether he was angry, embarrassed or ashamed. For one thing, What beautiful girl? He may not have minded if there had been one! Two, he had never woken up next to a girl! Period! And Three, It just was none of her business anyway!

"Hmm, it seems that you don't find this one attractive huh? No matter, that can be fixed with time." She simply stated. Going from playful to full business in less than 10 seconds. "So may I have the pleasure of knowing the young lord's name?"

"K-Kace," quickly coughing to clear his throat, " My name is Kace."

Wait something was wrong with what she had just said.

"Hold on! Lord? Where did that come from?"

"Oh? Are you not then? I assumed you were off at least a Lord rank for being able to fend of myself, The Great Shaman Vaskra, as well as Kharja The Bloodhound, who happens to be the Warlord of this domain?"

Kace was confused at this point. After all, he did not remember seeing anything relating to ranks in his 'Status' screen.

"Is there a way to tell your rank?" he asked fixing Vaskra with his golden eyes.

"It's pretty simple," she said, showing her yellowing teeth in a wide grin. "You simply think the word of the gods, Status in your mind. It will appear below your level."

"And what if nothing shows up there?"

"Well in your case I wouldn't buy that for a second. However, If nothing were to appear then you are simply common rank for your race."

"Ho! So I'm just a common grunt then huh?"

There was a loud bang as Vaskra firmly faceplanted the floor. Peeling her face off the ground she simply stared at him in disbelief. 'A true MONSTER!' she screamed in her mind.

"That can't be!" she shrieked, "Let me check!"

She raced over the short distance with her hands outstretched.

"I'm not a fucking giant so kneel already!" she screamed as she angrily tapped her foot on the stone floor.

Kace groaned as he realised his rookie mistake. He had pissed a woman off! Even if she was a monster she was still a female one. He immediately facepalmed himself.

"I'm sorry." he simply said as he knelt on the cold ground.

Vaskra placed her green wrinkled hands on either side of his head. Channelling her mana she let out a soft word. "Inspect."

After a few minutes of nodding and grumbling to herself, she seemed to have accepted that he was indeed just a common rank.

"Now that I have seen it for myself I have no choice but to believe it," she said a little awestruck, "I think I get the gist of your race as well though I've personally never heard of one before. Simply put you are an apex predator. One who takes the best parts of its prey and make it your own. Further adding to your strength. Thinking along those lines it wouldn't be much of a stretch to believe that with enough gains you could reach a higher rank. Well in theory anyway."

Vaskra sighed as she sat back down on the bed. 'I've created a true monster. It'd be better to just serve him for now until he falls for my charms.' She began rubbing her hands together. A lustful look on her face.

Kace eyed her warily. That look on her face gave him the chills. Like seriously. Not happening!

Grumbling sounds suddenly came from his belly. 'Damn! I'm so hungry!'

"Ah, it's about that time I guess." Vaskra smiled as she took him by the hand.

Leading the way she dragged him through a bunch of dark twisting pathways. Sometimes when he looked back there was no trace of where they had come out. Like they had been made to only be seen from certain angles. This entire cavern was a literal death trap.

The smell of roasting meat flooded his nostrils, making his mouth water. 'It smells so good!'

"Hey, Vaskra? What are they cooking anyway?" he could not hold in his excitement anymore as literal drool dripped from his chin.

"Oh, I'll tell you once we've eaten. I'd quite like to know how similar our tastes are." She casually replied, batting her eyelashes.

As they rounded the last corner a full-blown party was an eruption. Noisy little green balls were bouncing off the walls as stone cups and bowls were used as missiles. Shrieks ensued as a glorious battle took place for the food. As hands grabbed for the meat spit-roasted over the fire pit others would be holding rocks in an attempt to break aforementioned hands before they could reach it first.

'This is utter madness!' Kace was shocked. A pair of hands shoved him for behind into the muddle. With a thunderous laugh Vaskra dove in yelling, "If your not fast, You're last!"

Before long Kace found himself enjoy g the carnage. Easily dodging the blows aimed at him while tossing goblins over his shoulder in his attempt to grab some grub. One poor, misfortunate goblin was even used a bowling ball by him.

"Strike!" he yelled, as his homemade ball scattered the group closest to the food.

Letting out a victory yell he lunged through the air, his jaw hanging wide open. The goblins went wild roaring with glee. As they watched wide-eyed as the newcomer gloriously seized the first bite.

Rolling on the ground he made a quick recovery taking a defensive stance. A large, juicy chunk of meat hanging from his mouth as he eyed his competitors.

This resulted in a chorus of laughter and table banging! He was now one of them.

[Notification]: You have successfully gained the respect of a tribe of goblins. Awarding +10 respect with Goblin race.

[Notification]: You have achieved a legendary feat among the Goblins. During the traditional Battle of First Bite, it will become customary to try and replicate your actions.

Title Earned: Glutton

These notifications put a smile on his face as he imagined a bunch of green-skinned piranhas flying around whenever dinner would be served. Laughing heartily Kace chewed his spoils of war. Gulping it down and burping satisfactorily. Savouring the taste.

[Digestion Activated]: New DNA detected. Analysing. Awarding +50 exp

[Assimilation Activated]: DNA strand activated. Awarding +5 HP. New Ability Unlocked.

[Notification]: Skill: Spider Thread has been awarded.

Description: This is the innate skill of soldier level spider monsters. Able to secrete a mana enriched spider thread. Can be made tough like steel or extremely sticky. Highly versatile.

Kace's eyes went wide in horror.

"Wait! I ate what now?!"

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