Chapter 59: Repentance
Chapter 59: Repentance
MIA STIL'S POV:
I watched as Mr. Elrath entered the chambers that I was occupying. Was the headmaster himself going to question me?
"Mia, how are you feeling?" he asked. I knew it was just protocol to ask how a student was feeling after a rough incident. Whether he meant those words was a completely different matter.
"I'm fine," I said softly, my voice refusing to project itself with confidence.
"This is a very serious incident, Mia. Could you please tell me what happened?" asked the headmaster, taking a seat beside me.
I was well aware of what would occur depending on what I said. Brother Hans had always beaten me for the Accident, but I deserved it. I was someone who couldn't even control their own powers. What right did I have to attend such a specialized academy?
I waited in silence, unable to tell the truth. I wanted to tell them everything, tell them that I had become scared of my own family, scared to live freely. Haunted by the thoughts of the one I had killed, my actions were half-assed, unmotivated.
Mr. Elrath waited patiently but slowly understood that I had no intention of sharing anything. He sighed, not wanting to force anything. He was well aware that repercussions had to be handed out soon, but as to who he was supposed to hand them out to depended on me.
"You should rest, it's been a rough day. We'll talk tomorrow."
He got up, his green eyes watching me closely. The headmaster left the room, a small breeze mimicking his movements. I sighed in frustration, laying back in the bed that I had been using for my recuperation for the last few hours.
I heard the small chirps of birds as the sun began to rise, dawn bathing the world in its warm amber light. Weak luminescent rays sparkled through the open window, my hair rustling in the wind. I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath.
I had felt so free during these few days at the Academy. I wonder why?
A small knock at the door brought me back to reality, snapping my mind back to where it was supposed to be.
"Come in," I said, not even knowing if my voice was loud enough for the person on the other side of the door to hear.
The wooden door creaked open, a figure slightly taller than me entering the room.
"Hey, Mia," he said, smiling. "Are you okay?"
I didn't feel like this question was forced. The boy looked me right in the eyes, his own pupils showing genuine care and worry. I nodded., a small sigh of relief escaping the boy.
"What are you doing here, Jay?" I asked.
I didn't necessarily dislike his presence, but for some reason being alone was more calming for me. Jay seemed to understand that though, not approaching me too much as he kept a relative distance.
"I just wanted to ask you something," he said, his eyes locking with mine. I could see a slight fear within his eyes, a slight uncertainty that he wasn't used to dealing with.
"Why don't you use ice?"
I froze. I was aware that Jay knew I was an ice binder from his comment the first time we had fought in self-defense class, but I was slightly surprised that he had identified my explicit attempts at not using it.
Now that I thought about it though, it wasn't all that hard. I felt my lips creep up ever so slightly in a smile at the thought of how simple it really was to figure out.
Why was I amused? Why was I smiling?
The answer to the question was something that I could never smile about, but for some reason, the answer didn't seem so daunting right now. I knew how horrifying it was, but the usual chains that kept me from ever sharing it seemed to have weakened.
"I-I hurt someone very dear to me," I said finally, lowering my eyes in shame and in sorrow.
"Your brother?"
I looked up, bewildered.
"How?" I asked. The boy smiled weakly, his eyes looking at me with a gentle warmth that seemed to be speaking to me.
"Educated guess."
A few moments of silence passed, both of us reflecting on what the other had said. I looked up, words forming in my mouth as I echoed them without thinking.
"I'm scared, Jay."
Jay looked up, unfazed by the words. Was he expecting those words?
"I think we all are, Mia," he responded slowly. There was no doubt in my mind this time, those words were real. This boy was terrified deep down, horrified at certain possibilities that could occur at any time.
I put my arms around my bare legs, a position that I instinctively turned to during challenging conversations or moments.
"What are you scared of?" I asked timidly, ultimately backing away from my own words and attempting to turn the conversation towards Jay.
"Hm," he said, thinking carefully about his answer, "not living my life, losing others, disappointing those close to me."
I didn't say anything, reflecting on what he had said. The boy didn't forget my initial words, continuing his small soliloquy.
"What about you?"
I tensed up. Why did I say that in the first place? What was I afraid of?
I was afraid of my family, but for some reason that didn't seem like the right answer. What was I really scared of?
"I don't want to be alone. I don't want to be abandoned."
My voice came out like a small whisper, like a meek kitten intimidated by its surroundings. Jay stood up without a word, turning towards the door as he prepared to take his leave.
"I think there are more people around you than you realize, Mia. All you have to do is look around, and you'll find them."
My eyes widened at his words, his figure immediately triggering a fleeting image of the boy who had attacked brother Hans merely hours ago. The long brown hair, the relaxed yet tense pose, his turquoise eyes glowing with terrifying power and gentle compassion simultaneously.
He quietly left the room, his footsteps echoing down the hallway as I looked out the window again. The chirping of the birds resumed, but my eyes were drawn to the source of the noise. A small family of white birds lay on a humble nest, all of them chirping happily.
They had always been there, those birds. But for some reason, I hadn't been able to see them.
I felt a small knot on my chest slowly undo itself, my shoulders dropping as an invisible weight was lifted off my shoulders.
I know what happened to me.
I had killed my younger brother, an act I had mourned for my entire life, a scar I would have to endure for my entire existence, but that's all I could ever do. I had accepted my punishment, and the rest of my days would be spent attempting to repent for my sin.
My family wasn't the last thing I had. Starting with Jay, I'd build a new family. A family that would accept my mistake, accept me for who I was. All I had to do was open my eyes.
A small tear trickled down my cheek, a wide smile spreading across my cheeks. My face hurt from the grin that had appeared on my face, giggles echoing from my throat.
"I think I finally found them, Lio."
What had happened to me a few hours ago?
I was assaulted by my brother, and an unknown hero had intervened, ultimately saving my life.
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