Chapter 737 UNREQUITED LOVE
"LEWIS, wait!" Neoma said. Even though she was always careful about touching Lewis, she couldn't help but grab her "son" by the arm. "Where are you going?"
"They have to know," Lewis said in an urgent voice, his golden eyes still glowing as his emotions became more unstable. "The emperor… Lady Roseheart…"
"Hell no," she said while shaking her head firmly. "Mama Boss and Papa Boss will lose it if they find out."
"Why did you keep it a secret from us, Princess Neoma?"
"I just don't want you to worry about me."
"What do you think we'd feel if we found out about your condition when it's already too late?"
Lewis was angry.
This was the first time that she saw her "son" react this way.
Lewis wasn't raising his voice, but his glowing golden eyes and stern voice said it all– he was upset, sad, and disappointed.
Of course, there were also tears in Lewis' eyes.
"I'm sorry for keeping it a secret from you, Lewis," Neoma said, caving in since she couldn't stand seeing Lewis devastated. "It's not like I'm going to keep this a secret from everyone. Just give me more time before I tell my family and your siblings about my condition."
"Aside from me, Ruto, and Trevor, who else knows about your shortened lifespan?"
"Grandpa Primo."
"I bet you didn't tell Ruto and Trevor about your condition, Princess Neoma," Lewis said bitterly. "They found out about it on their own, didn't they?"
"Well, Trevor has the Bookworm… and he also has a loose mouth…"
Lewis smirked bitterly.
[And I'm telling you– Lewis looks scary when he's acting like this!]
"My Fox Bead…"
Her eyes sharpened. "What about your Fox Bead?"
"If you consume my Fox Bead, we can extend your lifespan, Princess Neoma," Lewis said desperately. "Our clan's Fox Beads are the reason why the previous emperor, your grandfather, hunted us down in hopes of gaining immortality. I'll give you my Fox Bead."
"I don't need it," Neoma said while shaking her head firmly. "If I take your Fox Bead, you'll die. Do you think I can live with myself after you die for my sake, Lewis?"
"You're making me feel lonely even when I'm just next to you… Neoma."
To say that she was shocked to hear Lewis call her by her first name without honorifics would be an understatement.
"Lewis, you made a promise when we were kids," Neoma reminded him. "You're supposed to call me 'princess.'"
"Everyone already recognizes you as the royal princess. You're no longer Prince Nero's proxy."
"Even so, you are my knight," she said calmly. "You're going to become my Guardian Knight once my position as the royal princess becomes official."
"Once Prince Nero ascends to the throne, you'll no longer be a princess."
"That's right. Once my twin brother becomes the emperor, I will no longer be an Imperial Princess. I'll probably become a grand duchess at best," she said, nodding. "But right now, I'm still a princess."
"Why can't I call you by your first name?"
"Why do you want to call me by my first name?"
"Because I want you to stop treating me like a "son,"" Lewis said in a firm voice. "I want you to see me as a man because, maybe by then, you'll finally depend on me."
"Lewis, you know that I can never see you as a man."
As expected, Lewis looked heartbroken as soon as he was rejected.
Neoma hated hurting Lewis. But she also didn't want to lead him on. He gave her an honest confession, so he deserved an earnest response.
"That doesn't mean I don't depend on you, Lewis," Neoma said softly. "I'm sorry for making you feel lonely because I tend to act like a tough cookie. But I need you, Lewis. I know it's selfish to say this now, but I want you to continue staying by my side."
"As your Guardian Knight?"
"As my family."
"That's really selfish."
She smiled sadly at him. "I'm sorry."
"Then let me do something selfish, too," Lewis said softly. "I won't ask you to like me back, but I will continue liking you the way I've always had, Princess Neoma."
That didn't sound like Lewis was asking for permission.
And it also looked like he wouldn't change his mind.
"I will allow you that much. However…" Neoma poked Lewis' chest– the part where his heart was– lightly. "Your pain is your responsibility."
Lewis suddenly burst out crying again.
His tears rolled down quietly earlier.
But this time, he was crying like the child that she thought he was.
[He never cried like this when we were kids…]
Now Neoma wanted to beat up herself for making Lewis cry.
"Princess Neoma, I don't care if my love remains unrequited as long as I can stay beside you," Lewis said between sobs. "If you die, then I'll kill myself."
That scared her because she knew that Lewis was serious.
"You are, you were, and you will always be my reason for living, Princess Neoma," Lewis continued, his voice filled with pain and loneliness. "I can't live without you, so please don't leave me alone. This world means nothing to me if you're no longer here."
Neoma choked up in tears while listening to Lewis.
She knew she should scold him for idealizing his death just like he did when he was a kid. But she also knew that she was partly responsible for Lewis having that kind of mindset.
"Don't say that, Lewis," Neoma said, her tears rolling down her cheeks. "You're no longer alone in this world. You already have friends in Hanna and your siblings. Even if I'm gone, you still have our family."
Lewis shook his head firmly. "You're the only one I need, Princess Neoma."
"Lewis…"
"You are my world– my everything," he said, suddenly wrapping his arms around her.
To say that she was surprised would be an understatement.
Lewis didn't like skinship, so she was always careful about touching him.
Neoma would always ask permission from Lewis first, or she'd only touch his clothes.
Hence, she was surprised when she suddenly pulled him for a hug.
Although he didn't ask first before hugging her and invading her personal space, she actually didn't mind because she knew that it took him all the courage he had to touch her.
[And there are times verbal consent isn't needed between close friends– just like now.]
"Princess Neoma, you asked me to live for you when I wanted to die– and I DID," Lewis said in a cracked voice. Then he buried his face against her neck, his warm tears touching her skin. "So, can I ask you to live for me this time?"
Neoma shut her eyes tight, her tears falling down her cheeks silently as she hugged Lewis back. "I won't die, Lewis," she promised him softly. "In return, don't ever say that you'll kill yourself again, okay?"
***
WOAH.
Trevor thought it was already his end when Prince Nero stabbed him in the chest with the ice dagger. He seriously thought he was about to die since the bastard– er, the Crown Prince made sure that his ice dagger would pierce through his heart.
But he actually felt better after that.
It was just a little uncomfortable because his chest felt cold… literally.
[I feel like there's a huge block of ice stuck in my chest.]
"It seems to be working," Prince Nero said, sounding proud of himself. "Zeru said that his ice could slow down the killing effect of the Impure Mana."
"Prince Nero, I understand that you wanted to try freezing the Impure Mana inside me, but did you really have to stab me?"
The Crown Prince shrugged. "We need to protect your heart the most."
"Should I, uh, thank you for stabbing me?"
"I don't need to hear that from you. I didn't save you anyway. You're still going to die– I just slowed down the process just like what my mother did."
"Why did you help me, Your Royal Highness?"
"I didn't help you– I just wanted to try the technique that I've learned from Zeru."
[Really now?]
"I thought you helped me because you didn't want Princess Neoma to get sad if I died, Prince Nero."
The "tsundere" Crown Prince flinched, then he changed the subject. "I'm here to ask you what you did to Rubin Drayton?"
Ah, right.
[That handsome bastard…]
"Duke Drayton sent me a letter this morning, demanding that I bring you to him since there were witnesses that you tried to kill his son. I figured it was you based on the description. And the duke saw you with Neoma during the trial, so he knows you're working for my twin sister."
Oh, right.
[The Drayton knights saw me beating Rubin Drayton to a pulp, but I didn't know that it was him initially.]
"Rubin Drayton also sent me a letter, but his tone is different from his father's."
"Huh?"
"Rubin Drayton actually sounded smart and mature in the letter he sent, which is strange because he's supposed to be dumb," Prince Nero said, frowning. "Anyway, he's also requesting to have a private audience with Neoma."
[Ah, Rubin Drayton is probably back in his usual self after I locked out Dilan Crowell's soul from his body.]
"Do you know why that bastard wants to see my twin sister?"
[Look at Prince Nero unconsciously claiming Princess Neoma as "his" twin sister after putting her through hell.]
Prince Nero knitted his eyebrows while looking at him. "Don't make me repeat myself, Trevor Kesser."
[So impatient.]
"Don't let Rubin Drayton see Princess Neoma," Trevor said, sighing. "He'll probably fall in love with my Moon Princess now that his sanity is back."
[Now I really can't die or else, all those pests will steal my Moon Princess from me!]
***
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