Taming the Queen of Beasts

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*****

ELRETH

"But all my female friends have done it too!" she protested. "None of them are walking around, soul-sore because they—"

"Are you certain?" her mother asked with a pointed look.

Elreth shut her mouth.

Gwyn.

Aaryn had mated her a year earlier. One time. After they'd both drunk too much at a feast. And Aaryn had regretted it the next day. Mainly because Gwyn had become… fixated on him.

Elreth squirmed. She'd thought Gwyn's attachment to Aaryn was an overreaction to something small. It had put something of a wall up in their relationship because she'd communicated early on to Gwyn that she thought the female needed to just give up and move on. She'd said it as a friend, but Gwyn had been careful around her ever since.

And Aaryn had to be careful with Gwyn.

"So… you think if I mate Dargyn I'll be like Gwyn is with Aaryn?" she asked, confused. She and Gwyn were very different personalities. Elreth had never pined after a male in her life.

"Not necessarily. But that same sensitivity lives in you, Elreth, I'm sure of it," her mother said. "And I fear Aaryn might be right: If you toss this away too quickly or too easily, you may regret it."

"I regret experiences I had," her father said quietly.

Elreth sighed. "Yours started a war, Dad. I don't think Dargyn is going to lead a revolution if I mate him once and then don't call."

Her father chuckled, but sobered quickly. "That wasn't the only one I regretted, Elreth. I wish… I wish I'd saved some of the discovery your mother had for her. I wish I'd discovered some of those things with her, instead of before her. I wish I didn't share those memories with females that aren't her."

Elreth dropped her head in her hands, groaning. "I'm sorry, I know you guys have something special. And I'm happy for you. I want that. I do. But I know so many Anima who never regret their… what did you call them? Connections?"

"It's true. Many do not."

"And it's also true, I was probably able to enjoy my first experiences better because your father was so considerate and knowledgeable. He was able to—"

"Really, really don't need specifics, Mom, thanks."

Her mother giggled and it made her sound twenty years younger.

"All I'm saying, El, is that don't assume because others can walk away from those moments without care that it will be the same for you."

"And don't assume that just because someone tells you they don't regret it that they're telling the truth," her father added. "People have a lot of reasons for not admitting when they've made a mistake—and some of them are very good ones. That doesn't mean they wouldn't change things if they had a second chance."

"So, you're saying I should try and find a true Mate without ever having mated anyone?"

Her mother shrugged. "I'm saying, I think it's wise to wait until you're certain. Don't give yourself to anyone who doesn't light you up inside."

"And maybe more importantly, don't give yourself to anyone who doesn't light up for you, El," her father said quietly. Then he reached for her hand, and Elreth found she needed to swallow the pinch in her throat.

"But… we don't all find our true mates like you two did," she murmured.

"Isn't it worth waiting to see if you can?" he replied.

"But what if it never happens?"

Her mother broke in then, "I would bet on your father's life that you will find yours, Elreth. You are too special not to."

"How can you be so sure?"

Her father frowned, examining her. "You really don't have a clue? At all? No… niggles?"

"None! I wish I did! I wish I had someone I could focus on and wonder about and… explore. But… I just never have."

Her mother sighed. "Just… don't rush, El. Give it a little more time. One more season at least. You're going to have a great deal to do in the coming months. I believe things will become clear to you eventually. But if you aren't excited about a male—or worse, if you're scared—don't give yourself. Even if it's fun, you will regret it eventually. If only because it will stand between you and your true mate later."

"Aaryn said that, too," Elreth admitted. "About not to go to anyone who scares me. But everyone makes me nervous. Because I'm scared of this! So how can I not feel scared if a male is in front of me that might do it?"

Her mother smiled. "Trust me. When it's the right male, you won't be feeling fear, Elreth. I promise." Then she looked at her father and they both smiled.

"You guys are disgusting," Elreth groaned.

They both laughed.

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