The Detective is Already Dead

Chapter 57: Chapter 3.1

Yesterday's friend is today's enemy

The fact that Charlotte Arisaka Anderson and I didn't get along was nothing new.

We'd first met more than three years ago. I'd been Siesta's assistant for about six months then, and I'd finally gotten used to this extraordinary life. Not that I was happy about it.

"Kimi, there's someone I want to introduce you to tomorrow."

When Siesta told me that, I got all paranoid that I'd be meeting her boyfriend, and I was all anxious when I went to bed that night... Well, not really anxious. Just moody.

The next day, Siesta introduced me to Charlotte Arisaka Anderson, a girl about my age. My memories of our first conversation are still vivid:

"Who is this girl with the crazy dark circles?" "Who is this guy with the crazy dark circles?"

It was less a conversation than a name-calling competition, and we were both short on sleep. That day, Siesta said she needed more help with a mission than I could give her, so she'd called in Charlotte...but the fuss she put up was completely abnormal.

I didn't know the details, but Siesta had become her teacher for some reason, and ever since, Charlotte had considered herself Siesta's first apprentice... And then I'd shown up as her assistant. It must've been a pretty big shock.

To no one's surprise, Charlie and I completely blew the job that day. Siesta had told us to work together to capture a certain target, but our first meeting had gone terribly and torpedoed any chance we had at successful teamwork.

"Charlotte! How long does it take to figure out you're standing on my foot?!"

"Oh, I'm sorry. I thought it was your face." "Then get off of it!"

We kept fighting, and since we prioritized showing off over the whole

"working together" part, the target got clean away.

After that, we met whenever Siesta needed it, which was often, and we fought every time. When Siesta died, our relationship broke off temporarily...but here we were again. As a matter of fact, the relationship might never have broken off in the first place.

After all—

"Kimizuka, you'll never get married. There's just no way."

Even now, three years after we'd met, Charlotte was grousing at me. "Man, that's not fair."

About half an hour after I'd had Scarlet evacuate Natsunagi and Saikawa, Charlie was insulting me. We'd had a knock-down, drag-out fight, and now we were sprawled out next to each other on the floor of the half-demolished living room.

"Well, I mean, come on. What kind of jerk hits a delicate girl in this day and age?"

Ah. So she was annoyed that the punch I'd thrown at the end out of sheer stubbornness had hit home. If she was going to take that tack, though—

"My injuries are way worse, all right?" I retorted through the pain of the cuts in my mouth. I was all torn up.

Even if that attack from Scarlet had weakened Charlie, there was no way I could win a straight fight against her. It was a miracle I wasn't dead.

"Haaah, my energy is gone. Help me up." Charlie sounded apathetic, as if the hostility from just a minute ago had never been. She raised both arms limply toward the ceiling.

"What are you, Siesta?"

"...I did not want to know that you and Ma'am did things like this."

"It wasn't because I wanted to. I had no choice." If I hadn't done it, that nap-loving detective would never have gotten out of bed.

"Haaah. Well, whatever." Charlie got up. "Here." She held out a hand to my black-and-blue self.

"Is that coated with poison or something?"

"You seriously don't trust me, do you?" Charlie started to laugh it off, but then— "Well, you've got a point." With a self-mocking smile, she quietly withdrew her hand.

After forcing my aching body to get up on its own, I faced Charlie. "Except you weren't actually trying to kill me. Were you?"

Charlie didn't answer.

However, in the earlier confusion, she'd said it herself: Her objective was to kill Yui Saikawa. Natsunagi and I just happened to be on the scene.

Besides, it really didn't seem as if she'd been giving everything she had in our subsequent fight. That hinted that there was still time to talk this over.

"If you keep getting in my way, I'll show you no mercy either," Charlie responded, although she looked away as she said it.

"Charlotte, why are you trying to kill Saikawa? Weren't you two friends?"

Saikawa and Charlie had first met on that cruise, about ten days ago. It was true that they hadn't known each other long, but we'd been living under the same roof for the past few days. It didn't seem as if Charlie could actually hate Saikawa... So why?

"Friends? Who are you talking about?" With a humorless smile, Charlie gave a flat no. "I've never made one of those." There wasn't the slightest hint of confusion in her expression, and she didn't seem to be bluffing. She genuinely thought that. That was how she'd lived her life. "All I do is carry out the mission I'm given, as part of my organization. That's my job, and it's the only way I live. There's no room for a fuzzy concept like 'friends' in there."

Charlotte Arisaka Anderson was a lone agent who'd undergone military training for the exceptionally talented since she was small, and she had belonged to a series of organizations on her own. As far as she was concerned, orders from her organization were everything. She'd never dream of disobeying them.

"So you're telling me your organization ordered you to assassinate Saikawa?"

Charlie nodded wordlessly.

Assassinate Saikawa—the first thing those words made me think of was SPES. After the earlier sapphire incident, that was where my mind inevitably went. But—

"Charlie, you're not telling me you've got a connection to SPES, right?"

Earlier, Bat had told me that Seed's objective was to use Saikawa's body as a vessel. SPES wasn't trying to kill her. However, some organization had ordered Charlie to assassinate Saikawa. I couldn't reconcile those two facts.

"...Yes, that's right. I haven't sold you out and gone over to SPES. As a matter of fact," she said, "it's the other way around. Both I and the person

who issued my orders want to destroy SPES, just like you do." "In that case—"

"What's different is the lengths we're prepared to go to in order to do it." Charlie's eyes were cold. She wouldn't allow any compromises or bargaining. "You already get it, don't you? Right now, Seed's deteriorated to the point where he has to switch to another vessel. If we destroy that vessel, what do you suppose will happen to Seed?"

"...! If the person he's planning to take over is gone, then Seed will..."

Die.

We didn't even have to fight Seed himself. If we just destroyed that vessel...

If Yui Saikawa died, Seed wouldn't last much longer.

"...So you want to sacrifice Saikawa in order to take down Seed?" "I told you. We're prepared to go to different lengths."

"Who's 'we'?" I said, still aching all over. "You'd better tell me that, at least. Listen, Charlie. If you're an agent who obeys orders without question, then tell me: Who's your boss? Who thought of this ridiculous idea?"

"It's me."

A flat, cold voice echoed in the room. It was enough to shut down my exasperation instantly. I turned toward the door, and...

"I ordered her to liquidate Yui Saikawa."

A redheaded lady detective who always looked good behind cigarette smoke was standing there.

The enemy was there all along

"Ms. Fuubi?"

Someone who hadn't even been on my radar had just walked in, and my thoughts froze up for a second.

In the meantime, she ground out her cigarette under her foot, then stalked over to me. What in the world is going on? I was about to ask, but—

"Charlotte, why are you slacking off?" Before I could, Ms. Fuubi decked Charlie.

Charlie crashed to the floor, then curled up with a pathetic moan.

"...! What the heck are you doing?!"

Ms. Fuubi ignored me. She went over to Charlie and hauled her up by her blond hair.

"Hey, Charlotte. I'm going to ask you one more time. What are you doing?"

"I'm r-really...sorry..."

"Huh? Look, I'm asking what you're doing. I told you to kill Yui Saikawa here, didn't I?" Ms. Fuubi pulled on Charlie's hair even harder.

"...! No, what are you doing?!" I couldn't just stand by and watch this; I got between them.

"Kimizuka, is this somebody you should be protecting?"

...Yeah, she had a point. Right now, Charlie was trying to kill one of my friends. But still. "She's not somebody you should be hitting either, Ms. Fuubi."

"...Huh. You've almost got a spine now."

She stepped away from me and Charlie, although probably not because I'd convinced her.

"Are you okay?" I turned to Charlie; she'd put a hand to her swollen cheek.

She must have cut her mouth; there was blood leaking out of the corner. "I don't need you worrying about me."

"If you can manage insults, you're fine." In that case, there was just one person here I should be focusing on. "Fuubi Kase. What are you?"

She had Charlie working for her, and she'd ordered Saikawa's death from the shadows. Who was she really?

It was a perfectly natural question, and in response, she said: "I'm the Assassin."

She made no attempt to hide it. "...You're another of the Tuners?"

"Oh, you know that word already, huh?"

"Up until just now, I believed you were a kind policewoman, you know." "Ha! There's no way a regular lady detective could become an assistant

police inspector at this age." Fuubi lit another cigarette, then exhaled a big puff of smoke. " 'Police officer' is just my cover. My role as a Tuner is Assassin: I hide myself, deceive everybody, and kill the enemy. That's my job."

"...So this time, your 'enemy' is Saikawa?"

"No." Fuubi narrowed her eyes. "My target is SPES. That's all."

...That matched what Charlie had said.

"Then you're going to kill Saikawa as a way to defeat Seed?"

Saikawa could become the vessel that would revive Seed. They thought that killing her would mean indirectly killing him.

"That's the one. Seed went out of his way to make contact with Scarlet. Then Scarlet started acting sketchy. Now Bat has too. We need to assume we're out of time. That's why I sent that girl in, undercover... I never thought she'd be so useless."

Fuubi sneered cruelly down at Charlie. "..."

Charlie looked away, biting her lip and probably ruing her own clumsiness. "If I hadn't been tied up with that robot, I would have been able to give the

order sooner. She screwed up my schedule, dammit."

So SIESTA had been at Fuubi's since yesterday, huh? She'd picked up on the fact that Fuubi was the one we needed to deal with, not Bat. Then she'd fought with her for over a day, keeping her pinned down.

"So, Charlotte. Where are they now? You'd better at least know that

much," Fuubi pressed. There was a threatening undercurrent to her voice. "...Heading for the airport, it looks like." Charlie was still shaky, but she

got to her feet, using the table as a support.

Had she put a transmitter on Saikawa? They'd been living together; she'd probably had plenty of chances.

"I see. She is wealthy, after all. Is she planning to use a private jet? Well, that's fine. I'll have them lock down the airports right away. Let's go."

Fuubi turned on her heel, heading out of the house with Charlie. "You think I'm just going to let you go?"

If they did, I was going to be seriously offended. Without waiting for them to answer, I pointed my gun at their backs.

—But.

"Obstruction of justice."

Right after I heard that voice, I was on the floor with the wind knocked out of me.

For a second I thought I'd been shot, but I hadn't heard a gun, and I wasn't bleeding.

Just one blow. She'd hit me once, on the chin. That was all.

But my body wouldn't move, and my vision was gradually tunneling. Ignoring me, the two of them left the house.

"...Should've said 'illegal firearm' first."

And with that pointless rejoinder, I blacked out.

I don't know how long I was unconscious.

Out of nowhere, I thought I'd picked up a familiar scent. As if I was following it, I slowly opened my eyes.

Someone was standing there, holding out a hand to me. "...Si...esta?"

Without thinking, I said that familiar six-letter word.

The figure gave a deep sigh. Then she glared down at me in a way that seemed impossible for a machine.

"Are you stupid, Kimihiko?"

If you'll be my assistant

"You look pretty pathetic," SIESTA said as she helped me up, a little exasperated. "Not only that, but you've completely trashed my house. I'll be sending you a bill for the repairs later."

"...Geez. Not fair."

This place had been hit by a whole string of enemy attacks. She should be thanking me for having protected it.

"Actually, you look awful yourself."

It was probably because she'd fought with Fuubi before she came here. Her clothes were ripped in places, and the skin beneath had taken heavy damage as well.

"I didn't lose. I just made a temporary strategic retreat." "You're as proud as the original Siesta."

"And I only tore the maid uniform reluctantly, to suit your preferences." "You don't have to copy the way she set me up as a pervert."

Get a load of this android. It isn't just the way she looks; even her personality and the way she treats me are exactly like the original. Even though both Natsunagi and Saikawa have settled the score with their pasts, and I'm just about to move on from a few things myself... Seriously, gimme a break.

"Hey, what should I do?"

...That means if I slip up and ask her for help, well, there was no way around it. It's not my fault. It's society's fault. It's Siesta's fault. "You probably know already, but they've basically got us in checkmate."

Charlie's betrayal had come out of nowhere. If things went on like this, Saikawa was definitely going to get killed, and maybe Natsunagi would get killed trying to stop them. If Charlie got serious, there was no way I could win a fight with her, and we were also dealing with Fuubi. A Tuner.

Besides, if I chose to help Saikawa, I might end up indirectly helping Seed revive—basically selling out the entire world.

"Pathetic." SIESTA sighed again, as if she couldn't stand to watch me stress out. "Kimihiko, your nature practically makes the entire world your enemy in the first place."

"Wow, I'm way too deep. What kind of humongous sin did I commit in my previous life, huh?"

Hey, even I'm not picking a fight with the entire world on purpose, okay?

—Besides.

"Even if that's true, Siesta was there."

The entire world might have been my enemy, but she'd stayed with me. She'd been frustrated with me; she'd say, "Are you stupid, Kimi?" but she'd still taken my hand and fought alongside me.

While she was there, I hadn't been alone.

"As long as Siesta was around, that was all I needed," I muttered, remembering.

"...Kimihiko, do you know you're doing that?" I realized that SIESTA seemed upset.

"Hm? Doing what?"

SIESTA only muttered something at a volume I couldn't quite catch: "...I wonder what stirred my maternal instincts—the discrepancy or the dejected expression."

At times like this, she was usually saying something unflattering about me, so it was probably wiser to pretend I hadn't noticed... Kind of a sucky adage to live by, though.

"Well, what are you going to do, Kimihiko?" SIESTA turned back toward me. "You're facing a comrade's betrayal. A friend in crisis. Multiple enemies who are far too big and powerful. And, ultimately, the possibility that you might make the world your enemy. What will you do?"

SIESTA's blue eyes were gazing straight at me. I really couldn't believe that gaze was fake. It was exactly like it had been on that day. She was leaving the choice to me.

Should I fail to save my friend, and save the world? Should I save my friend, and turn the world against me?

The decision was too weighty for me to make. How could it not be? I'd spent all of my eighteen years getting pulled into stuff.

Now, suddenly, the fate of the world was in my hands? How? "You don't get dragged into things. You drag others in."

...Yeesh. If it was going to be like this, maybe Hel was onto something back then.

In that case, though...there was only one thing I needed to do. Just one sentence I had to say.

If I was really about to become a key figure dragging the world into peril,

then there was one person I needed to pull in first.

It didn't matter if she wasn't the real one. It was okay if it was just for now.

—Even so.

"Siesta— Be my assistant."

I had no idea what my face looked like right then.

I just held out my left hand, wearing what I was pretty sure was an awkward smile.

"Very well. Come this way."

Siesta accepted, but she didn't take my hand. She just walked off, heading deeper into the house.

"...Hey, SIESTA, I was pretty impressed with that one." It's going to be really embarrassing if she just ignores it. I mean, c'mon.

"We've used up too much time as it is. We need to hurry, or we won't catch up with those two."

"If you're going to be sensible, I've got no comebacks to make."

"Also, for some reason, your attempts to make this a touching scene are incredibly irritating."

"I wasn't trying. That's, like, the meanest thing you could have said after that." Even as I complained, I followed SIESTA down a corridor, and then—

"A wall?"

At first glance, it looked like a dead end, but...

"Open sesame." SIESTA chanted a spell that was way past its expiration date, and the wall rumbled and slid to one side, revealing a set of stairs.

"Let's go." SIESTA started down the stairs. "Weren't there any better spells?"

"The words of the spell don't matter. It's designed to recognize my voice." I see. This was SIESTA's hideout, all right.

"So if I screamed, for example, 'Kimihiko's first love was Siesta,' it would still open."

"You have no proof. And this isn't one of those security questions for when you forget your password."

"We're here."

At the bottom of the stairs was a vast open area, like an airplane hangar. A big motorcycle with vaguely familiar coloring sat inside it.

"It's the Sirius Version Beta." Siesta promptly climbed onto the white bike. "This is the vehicle mode of the humanoid weapon Sirius."

"That thing we rode in London?"

Right, Siesta had said she'd negotiated with the British government to borrow that. Now that I thought about it, that had only been possible because she was a Tuner and could formally negotiate with the army.

"But will we be able to catch up to them on this now?" "We'll take a shortcut through the tunnels."

How far did this space go? Don't tell me it goes all the way to the tunnels in London. I was about to ask when my gaze shifted from the bike to SIESTA. "...When did you change clothes?"

She'd switched from the ragged maid outfit into the military dress the former ace detective had worn. "Quick-changes are a mandatory skill for detectives."

"I think they're more important for idol singers, really."

And also, don't just change in front of a guy like that's normal... Geez.

"All right, let's get going. Hold on tight." "Yeah, yeah."

Prompted by SIESTA, I straddled the bike and put my arms around her waist.

Pale silver hair and a gray dress. This was the back I'd seen constantly for three years.

"Please stop indulging in sentiment while hugging my waist." "Haaah. Your body sure is nice and warm."

"That's the grossest thing you've ever said. Actually, Kimihiko, you're pretty free with sexual harassment, aren't you?"

"Because I'm constantly on the receiving end, yes. C'mon, once in a while is fine."

"Of course it isn't. Seriously." As SIESTA said that, she smiled suddenly. "Listen, SIESTA. You wouldn't happen to be...?"

"All right. In that case, let's go discipline the apprentice."

However, it only lasted for a moment. SIESTA's expression turned serious again, and...

"—Sirius, prepare for launch." With that, she revved the engine.

"You didn't think that was cool, did you?" "I'll shake you off."

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