The Inconceivable Flame: A Fallen Angel“s Disguise

We are often told that time is a healer. With time, everything gets better.

But...

The truth is...

Time was never a healer. If anything, time is a teacher instead.

It doesn’t heal our wounds to make us feel better. It just teaches us the way to bear that pain and live with it. In all honesty, there is no such pain that actually truly fades away.

Pain sticks with us but the difference is that pain sticks to us like our shadow.

How is it a shadow?

When we get close to something that brings happiness in our life again, for that particular time, pain leaves our side as the shadows leave us in darkness.

No matter how old this pain gets, it doesn’t fade away. But then again, without this pain, we all be left with no reminders of our mistakes.

As the saying goes, ’Pain demands to be felt.’

We all have different ways to cope with that pain. For Ru, she made herself busy with work to not let herself break down. After seeing the same marking as she had on her body, she felt her body reminding her of all the pain that it went through.

The feeling of being torn apart was overwhelming her to the extent that she had the urge to scream. But...

She didn’t scream.

Instead, she chose to smile as always.

Why?

She was taught to never let others hear her screams of pain. Because it would only make people pity her and young master Ru was anything but pitiful.

No matter how much her brain was screaming inside, she had never let anyone hear those screams. She would never show her vulnerability to anyone. It was a taboo in her life.

Right now, to escape from the screaming voices in her head, she had buried herself in different affairs for the whole day. But when the screams didn’t leave her alone, she chose to pick up her football and went to the park nearby.

She’d been running around with the football aimlessly when she heard a voice from behind, "You seem to be quite fond of soccer."

Ru looked up to see Xiao Zhi-Ren sitting on a bench with his eyes trained on her. She felt like he had been there for quite a while now. Because he didn’t seem to be someone who was just passing by.

Ru took the ball in her hand and replied, "First, it’s called football. Second, it’s the only game that actually excites me."

Xiao Zhi-Ren smiled at her and said, "Well, soccer sure is one of the most played sports in the world."

"I don’t understand this," Ru started making Xiao Zhi-Ren raise his brow inquiringly. "Why do you Americans have to call it soccer? Clearly, for the entire world, it’s football."

"Let me correct you. Australians also call it soccer." Xiao Zhi-Ren argued.

Ru rolled her eyes at him saying, "It doesn’t explain the reason for being called soccer."

"That’s a good question. But America already has a game known as football." Xiao Zhi-Ren presented his answer as he crossed his arms before his chest.

Ru scoffed. "Mr. Xiao, that game is called rugby. Because neither it’s played with a ball nor it’s played by the feet."

"Mr. Xie, I think this is something we should not be arguing about since neither you are a complete English man and nor am I a complete American." He was quite reasonable and even Ru herself didn’t know why she started this argument in the first place.

But nonetheless, it helped her overcome the prickling pain and loud screams in her mind.

"Want some?" Ru looked at the bottle of water in the hand that he had extended towards her. She shrugged her shoulders and took the bottle before perching down beside him on the bench.

"Thank you!"

"You are most welcome!" He replied pleasantly and looked straight at the empty park. "Do you mind me asking what’s your deal with the hoods?" He had always seen Ru in hoods and that too in either black or grey color. But he chose to ignore this color part.

Ru looked at him through her peripheral vision and replied, "It helps me in concentrating at the things that are right in front of my eyes." He nodded his head as if understood the meaning behind her words. "Mey I ask what brought you here at this time?"

"Oh, me? I come for a walk whenever I feel stuffed up inside the house."

They sat in silence again. But the silence wasn’t awkward at all. Both were lost in their own thoughts. As Xiao Zhi-Ren’s mind was wandering off to find the emotion in those green eyes before him. Earlier when he saw Ru playing all alone, he felt like he saw a bit of agitation and anger emitting from her body.

But now, seeing the calm expression on Ru’s face, he was questioning his own mind. Was he overthinking? Perhaps not. Since until now, this was the first time he felt that there was something else to the young ’man’ beside him other than ’his’ tranquil and enchanting aura.

"You know, my face doesn’t have the answers written on it but I do know how to speak." Xiao Zhi-Ren jolted a bit hearing that deep voice. He was flustered for being caught for gawking.

He dry coughed a bit and spoke, "So, what’s up, Mr. Xie?" He knew he wasn’t close enough to Ru to ask anything personal. Therefore, he decided to do some casual chatting.

Ru shot up from her seat and looked at the sky curiously and said, "Oh, it’s a bird..." She clicked her tongue and shook her head in disappointment saying, "Tsk... Nah... It’s a plane... Oh, wait!" She turned her gaze to Xiao Zhi-Ren who was looking at her with his raised brows. "Ah! It’s Superman!"

Xiao Zhi-Ren pursed his lips trying hard to muffle his laugh but as they both looked at each other. Both had amusing smiles on their handsome faces and both ended up laughing together. Xiao Zhi-Ren never thought that the chairman of Metrix Consortium would give him such a childish reply for a simple ’What’s up?’

"Haha... That’s quite old..." Xiao Zhi-Ren said rolling his eyes at her.

"But you fell for it." Ru reminded him, making him scrunch up his face as he nodded.

"Fair enough!"

After their laughter died down, they started walking back towards the apartment building together. "Aren’t you excessively cheerful for someone who calls the shots for one of the largest and fastest growing group of companies?" Xiao Zhi-Ren asked while Ru was busy in spinning the ball on her finger.

Ru didn’t spare him a glance as she retorted, "Aren’t you too carefree yourself?" Xiao Zhi-Ren pursed his lips knowing he couldn’t argue with that. "But in all honesty, I think you’re not carefree at all. Just like you know in your heart that I’m not cheerful." The way she gave him a lopsided smile gave Xiao Zhi-Ren a start.

In his heart, he knew that the green-eyed ’man’ was not cheerful. But the way he always found ’him’ smiling gave Xiao Zhi-Ren believe for just a second that perhaps, his heart was wrong. Perhaps, this person was cheerful and he was just overthinking again.

But Ru’s answer broke that believe of ’maybe’ in him. Now, he could say that this young ’man’ was certainly hiding behind ’his’ cheerful persona. Like he was hiding behind a carefree one.

They were on a tree-lined pathway which led to the apartment building. Ru was distracted with her mind in chaos over plenty of things. Suddenly a fast car lost balance and changing lanes got on the pathway. Xiao Zhi-Ren pulled Ru, making her fall to the grass-clad ground with himself. If he had been a second late, Ru would have been severely injured.

"Are you okay?" Xiao Zhi-Ren asked her and looked at the way where the car vanished. "F*ck! People really have no sense of following the speed limit at all."

Ru sat frozen on the ground without moving. Xiao Zhi-Ren thought that the car gave her the fright but he didn’t know that she was not scared. Instead, she was in shock. A state of disbelief.

"Why did you save me?" Xiao Zhi-Ren heard her soft voice which wasn’t like what he was familiar with. The voice wasn’t deep. It was delicate like silver bells were chiming.

"Uh? Wasn’t I supposed to?" Xiao Zhi-Ren didn’t understand the context of her question.

This was the first time someone saved her without any reason. She always had to save herself along with the people around her. It never felt weird since she could save herself and others. But today, someone else saved her.

True, it was just an accident and he did it on instinct but for her, it meant a lot more. She dusted off her black trousers and looked at Xiao Zhi-Ren in the dark night. "Mr. Xiao, since you saved my life if you ever need me in the future for anything. Don’t hesitate from asking."

Xiao Zhi-Ren frowned since he thought it wasn’t a big deal at all. But seeing the look of resolution and sincerity in her eyes, Xiao Zhi-Ren could only nod his head. "I’ll hold you for that promise then."

Ru extended her hand for him to shake as she said, "Have faith in me. This young master’s promise is more important than his own life."

If she knew that this promise would one day make her want to strangle Xiao Zhi-Ren, she would have never given that promise without thinking.

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