Chapter 224 - 224 Bai Yu, the villainess, gladly accepted defeat against fate Part II
224 Bai Yu, the villainess, gladly accepted defeat against fate Part II
“Your Majesty…” A maid who had brought the tonic to her spoke. “His Majesty has an order forbidding anyone from disturbing Your Majesty’s rest.”
“Even General Yue?”
“Yes, Your Majesty.”
Bai Yu internally scoffed.
Ouyang Feilong had cut off all her escape routes. His action meant that she was treated as a suspect, barred from becoming further involved in the matter.
“Then summon the royal garden’s caretaker. Bengong wishes to ask about the preparation for the banquet.” If it was related to her work, Ouyang Feilong might have allowed her some movement. Bai Yu had spent quite some effort on organizing this banquet. No matter what plan Ouyang Feilong had, he would surely not try to interfere.
The workers in the royal garden were partly from the Bai family and the Yue family’s troops. It would not be difficult for Bai Yu to find a way to have one of them pass on her message to Yue Huiling. The Bai family might not be able to move, but she was sure she could utilize the workers.
“Your Majesty, the Emperor has given an order barring Your Majesty from handling all royal matters, including the preparation for the banquet.”
“What did you say?!”
.....
Bai Yu glared at the new maid, who seemed to have been sent here to repeat Ouyang Feilong’s order rather than to take care of her.
“His majesty has also added that the birthday banquet would be handled by Gui Fei and De Fei.”
Bai Yu became quiet. Was this not going too far? He was telling her to throw away the work that she had been preparing for a long time and let others take care of it?
Not only did he accuse her of committing a crime out of love for another man, but he also grounded her, not allowing anyone to meet her and vice versa. All her work within the inner court was delegated to others, including the banquet that she had dedicated herself to for multiple months… Was this not going too far?
Bai Yu balled her hands into fists under the sleeves. She took a deep breath, trying to suppress the surge of various emotions within her. She was quite calm while accepting the absurd order, but now she could hardly control herself…The effect of all those hurtful words could not be compared to a fraction of what she felt when she was forced to let go of the work she had started all by herself.
He knew how much she had done to prepare the banquet. Yet he still took it away from her. Did this harsh punishment come because Ouyang Feilong truly believed that she had hurt Bai Hua?!
No! This was not a part of any plan in Ouyang Feilong’s mind at all. This was not the result of him being pressured by anyone at all. She should stop trying to convince herself. Him going this far to sabotage her effort…This was a punishment, not a plan, a scheme, or any strategy!
“Your Majesty!”
Bai Yu had fallen deep into her thoughts, to the point of not realizing that she had lost all her strength within her body. She would have collapsed if Xiao Xi had not helped support her in time.
“B…bengong is fine.” Fine. She must be fine. It was only that the ‘trust’ she had given him was ‘destroyed’ because he ‘did not trust her like she trusted him’…
Bai Yu dragged her powerless body to the phoenix throne that no longer felt familiar. She waved her hand, dismissing her personal maids to have a moment of solitude to consider everything that had happened. She trusted him. She thought they understood each other. Why? Why did the person she gave all her trust stamp all over it by saying that her love was all an act? Why did he not give her a chance to explain even a word?
She still loved Ouyang Mingxian?
She had ordered Xiao Chang to cause Bai Hua’s miscarriage?
Only with these reasons, she became a villainess again?
How difficult it must have been for the villainess such as Bai Yu to be seen as a good person. Yet her being seen as evil was made as easy as turning the palm of her hand. She had once believed that Ouyang Feilong would not be like one of them. All along, she had believed that he would trust her.
But today’s decree was the answer. It told her what he ‘believed in’… and it was not her.
“Hic…” The left side of her chest felt as if it had been stabbed by countless needles. This pain, she remembered it well. She had felt it on the day that Li Wenrou had brought Song Lianhua to see her, to show her that her ‘trust’ was worthless to him.
Oh, Bai Yu. Why are you so hurt? It’s not that you’ve never felt this before… How many times have you gone through this kind of thing already? It only changes from Ouyang Mingxian to Li Wenrou to, this time, Ouyang Feilong.
At least in this life, Ouyang Feilong was merciful… He did not destroy her trust. He only did not trust her!
“…Hic…Foolish…”
Foolish, again and again. Hurt, life after life. Everything was because of the damned ‘trust.’ Why did she never learn?
“…Hic…Ugh.”
Tears blurred Bai Yu’s sight. Her breath stuttered because of the forceful sobs from her chest. She pressed her lips together tightly, covering them with her two hands to suppress the sound… She would never let anyone see her in such a pathetic state!
“Your Majesty…” Xiao Xi, who had been eavesdropping, called out to her out of worry.
“Get out!”
“Bu—”
“Get out! All of you!”
Her shout startled the servants outside the palace and drove them further away. How could the empress stay calm after receiving such an order? Even Xiao Xi had to fight against her worry and leave. Ever since that day of the poisoned guqin incident, this was the first time she saw Bai Yu acting like this.
Her young lady was hot-tempered. Whenever she was angry, no one could face her. And her voice a moment ago was not too different from what Xiao Xi had heard in the past…
“…Hic…Uuuhhh…”
Her hand repeatedly hit her chest in an attempt to disperse the pain in her heart. She could not handle the same feeling she had felt. The loss of trust was no less hurtful than the pain of her broken heart.
And when she thought of losing Ouyang Feilong, she could only shake her head. She could not accept it… She had yet to explain herself!
He could not do this to her!
Clang!
The phoenix hairpin made of gold fell from her hair because of the force she had used to shake her head. Bai Yu’s eyes moved to look at the golden phoenix on the floor, fallen from grace.
She became quiet as a scene appeared in her mind. Bai Yu moved to grab the small hairpin. She held it tight, so tight that her hand shook. The image of the color red oozing from the slit on her wrist appeared to her again and again. That night, she ended her life because of Li Wenrou. She could not believe that the same feeling would resurface as the last words Ouyang Feilong had said to her echoed in her ears.
‘A woman in love is always wicked.’
‘A woman in love is always wicked.’
‘A woman in love is always wicked.’
What if she was wicked?
Was a wicked person incapable of love?
Could he not trust a wicked person like her, not for a fraction of a moment?
“Heh!”
Bai Yu opened her hand that was holding the phoenix hairpin and studied its sharp end… Would the pain stop if this pierced her heart? Would this stop her wretched fate?
If her life ended, would this fate end as well?
The fate of a foolish woman…no matter which life.
No matter when, she could never win in a gamble of trust!
No matter which fate, she would always fail in love, losing all strength to continue to live.
Then…what would she continue for?
“I surrender.”
The hairpin was held tight and raised overhead. The villainess gathered all her strength to send the golden pin into her chest, through the fractured heart broken by the same fate over and over again…
She could no longer fight… Bai Yu, the villainess, gladly accepted defeat against fate.
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